For: Yourbrainwrites Prompt: Post DA:I Handers with an adopted kid Rating: E, Fluffy
Hawke’s eyes snapped open, every nerve and muscle in his body screaming for him to fight, to flee, to do something. Taking deep breaths to still his racing heart he finally heard the plaintive cries of the child.
He sat up on the hard mattress and glanced over on his still slumbering partner. Anders muttered something and turned over away from shuttered window. Hawke smiled down at Anders and moved his golden hair off his face, the silken hair such a contrast to Hawke’s calloused hand.
Gently swinging his aching body off the bed, Hawke threw on the tattered remnants of his robe from Kirkwall (Anders had insisted on burning it when they first fled into the country side from Kirkwall, but Hawke refused to burn the last link he had to his Amell bloodline.)
Padding down to the child’s room, Hawke paused by a window and took a moment to appreciate the scenery. The squat house overlooked a small stream and pond that reflected the full moon above, giving everything a dream-like quality. The night outside was quiet and still, even the omnipresent droning of the insects was absent and Hawke reveled in the silence.
After fleeing the burning city of Kirkwall, escaping the Fade, adopting Damien, and starting a small farm with Anders and some of the townspeople, Hawke had learned to appreciate quiet moments when nothing needed his immediate attention. Except that Damien started his quiet mewls again, snapping Hawke out of his reverie.
He quietly hurried to the boy’s room and saw him cowering underneath his quilt. It had been a gift from the boy’s aunt when Damien first came to live with them. The aunt explained that Damien’s mother used to live in Kirkwall and had been a patient of Anders while he operated his clinic there. After his mother had become pregnant out of wedlock, she had fled back to her older sister’s village where she gave birth and raised Damien with her help. When Damien’s mother had fallen ill a few years later, she entrusted his care to her sister and had passed away shortly thereafter. It had been pure chance that Hawke and Anders had found the cottage on the outskirts of the village, and the elderly aunt took it as a sign from the Maker and she pleaded with Anders for him to take the boy and raise him. Moved by the aunt’s pleas and the young boy’s plight, Anders agreed and he and Hawke had cared for the boy since.
Hawke at times still struggled to believe that he had a son to care for – he had long accepted that his status as a fugitive limited his chances for adopting a child, but every time Damien smiled a gap-tooth smile or hugged Hawke, he felt his heart leap.
“Damien, what’s wrong?” Damien startled and shot a glance to Hawke, his eyes wide and panicked. Pulling the quilt down below his head, he told Hawke about the monster that lived in the wardrobe that wanted to eat him.
“Damien, where ever did you hear such a fanciful tale?” Hawke chuckled slightly at the exciting tale and settled on the bed next to the young boy.
“Michael said so. He said that monsters live in wardrobes and eat little kids.” Lunging forward, Damien wrapped his arms around Hawke and shuddered as his imagination created more and more terrifying monsters in his mind.
“Oh my!” Feigning shock, Hawke hugged Damien closer and kissed the boy’s head, “I guess I’ll just have to fight the terrible monster now, won’t I?”
Damien stopped shaking and looked quizzically up at his father. “What?”
Hawke smiled and ruffled the boy’s raven hair. “Tell you what, I’ll go make sure that monster is gone, and then I’ll tell you a story until you fall asleep, okay?” Damien nodded enthusiastically and Hawke tucked him back into the bed.
Crossing to the wardrobe Hawke remembered when his own father had done the same for him and his siblings when they were young. They had been scared that a terrible monster was scratching at the walls of their room trying to eat them. They had all run into their parent’s room, all frightened and describing different monster to their parents. Amused, Malcolm had taken Hawke outside and they looked for this terrible monster. Instead, they found a branch from a nearby tree scratching at the wall in the wind.
Embarrassed, Hawke tried to deny ever feeling afraid, but Malcolm explained that fear wasn’t something to be ashamed of. “Son, fear is not bad. Fear is simply your heart telling you to be careful. When you feel afraid, do not despair. Instead, you must decide if you want to master your fear, or let it master you.” Together they broke the branch off and threw it in the compost heap, telling Carver and Bethany the truth behind the noises.
Remembering his father’s kindness, Hawke paused in front of the wardrobe. “Damien, will you help me, please?” Damien retreated deeper into the quilt and shook his head. “Son, I know you fear whatever is in this closet. But, if you never find out the truth, you’ll be afraid the rest of your life. I promise to keep you safe, but I think you need to do this.”
Damien paused and slowly slipped out of the bed. He joined Hawke and together they opened the wardrobe. Inside, Damien’s clothes and few toys were stacked while a wilted flower in a vase stood beside it all. After thoroughly checking to make sure it was safe, the pair closed the door and reconvened at the bed.
“So, there was no monster? Michael told a lie?” Damien’s voice sounded stronger, although Hawke could hear the exhaustion in it.
“I don’t think so. I think Michael was scared, so he told a story to make himself feel better. Sometimes, fear makes us do that, make up stories that make our fears easier to hide.”
Smiling, Damien snuggled closer to Hawke and sleepily asked, “But you don’t do that, right? You’re the bravest da in the whole world.” Before Hawke could respond, Damien fell asleep.
Softly extricating his self, Hawke returned to his bed and slid back beneath the quilt. Turning to look at Anders he was surprised to see his love’s eyes open and a smile on his face. “You are the bravest da in the whole world, aren’t you?” Hawke chuckled leaned his forehead against Anders.
The pair stayed like that for a moment before Hawke blurted that he still had nightmares. “I have dreams of the spiders. In the Fade. They cover me and I can’t escape.”
Anders hummed and grabbed Hawke’s hand. “I know. Justice sometimes sees your dreams in the Fade. But you know they’re only dreams, right love? You can’t be hurt by them. Not anymore.”
Hawke waited a moment before pulling his hand out of Anders'. “I know that, Love. But I still have them. It’s been over three years, and I still have them.”
“I used to have nightmares about the Circle. All the things I saw, the stories I heard. There were times where I did not sleep for weeks. Now, I never have them.”
Hawke sat up and looked over at Anders, “How did you stop them? Did Justice stop them?”
Anders shook his head and sat up as well, leaning against Hawke. “No. At first I tried burying myself in work to stop them but it didn’t help. What did help, was you Hawke.”
“Me? How so?”
“Every time I had a nightmare, I would think of you and how kind you were, and how you promised me such grand things. Soon, I found myself so happy and warm that no nightmare could hope to hurt me.”
Hawke found himself smiling, remembering all the love he felt with Anders and Damien. He remembered Merrill and her inexhaustible enthusiasm, Isabela and Varric and their humor that always seemed to lift his spirits. Aveline and her steadfast assuredness that helped keep the group grounded. Even Fenris and his dry humor always serving as a counterpoint to the tragedy and darkness of their time together was a welcome source of love. And of course, the blonde mage who offered his whole heart to him, asking for nothing in return.
Turning to him now, Hawke kissed him deeply, drinking in his love like an elixir. Breaking the kiss, Hawke again ran his hand through Anders’ hair and lay back down. That night, the whole house slept soundly, each occupied with dreams of the ones they loved.
(Sorry if its not that good, I'm still really new at writing fic, hope you enjoyed it and have a great holiday!)
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branchandroot
Secret Santinalia Gift
Date: 2015-12-19 09:34 pm (UTC)Prompt: Post DA:I Handers with an adopted kid
Rating: E, Fluffy
Hawke’s eyes snapped open, every nerve and muscle in his body screaming for him to fight, to flee, to do something. Taking deep breaths to still his racing heart he finally heard the plaintive cries of the child.
He sat up on the hard mattress and glanced over on his still slumbering partner. Anders muttered something and turned over away from shuttered window. Hawke smiled down at Anders and moved his golden hair off his face, the silken hair such a contrast to Hawke’s calloused hand.
Gently swinging his aching body off the bed, Hawke threw on the tattered remnants of his robe from Kirkwall (Anders had insisted on burning it when they first fled into the country side from Kirkwall, but Hawke refused to burn the last link he had to his Amell bloodline.)
Padding down to the child’s room, Hawke paused by a window and took a moment to appreciate the scenery. The squat house overlooked a small stream and pond that reflected the full moon above, giving everything a dream-like quality. The night outside was quiet and still, even the omnipresent droning of the insects was absent and Hawke reveled in the silence.
After fleeing the burning city of Kirkwall, escaping the Fade, adopting Damien, and starting a small farm with Anders and some of the townspeople, Hawke had learned to appreciate quiet moments when nothing needed his immediate attention. Except that Damien started his quiet mewls again, snapping Hawke out of his reverie.
He quietly hurried to the boy’s room and saw him cowering underneath his quilt. It had been a gift from the boy’s aunt when Damien first came to live with them. The aunt explained that Damien’s mother used to live in Kirkwall and had been a patient of Anders while he operated his clinic there. After his mother had become pregnant out of wedlock, she had fled back to her older sister’s village where she gave birth and raised Damien with her help. When Damien’s mother had fallen ill a few years later, she entrusted his care to her sister and had passed away shortly thereafter. It had been pure chance that Hawke and Anders had found the cottage on the outskirts of the village, and the elderly aunt took it as a sign from the Maker and she pleaded with Anders for him to take the boy and raise him. Moved by the aunt’s pleas and the young boy’s plight, Anders agreed and he and Hawke had cared for the boy since.
Hawke at times still struggled to believe that he had a son to care for – he had long accepted that his status as a fugitive limited his chances for adopting a child, but every time Damien smiled a gap-tooth smile or hugged Hawke, he felt his heart leap.
“Damien, what’s wrong?” Damien startled and shot a glance to Hawke, his eyes wide and panicked. Pulling the quilt down below his head, he told Hawke about the monster that lived in the wardrobe that wanted to eat him.
“Damien, where ever did you hear such a fanciful tale?” Hawke chuckled slightly at the exciting tale and settled on the bed next to the young boy.
“Michael said so. He said that monsters live in wardrobes and eat little kids.” Lunging forward, Damien wrapped his arms around Hawke and shuddered as his imagination created more and more terrifying monsters in his mind.
“Oh my!” Feigning shock, Hawke hugged Damien closer and kissed the boy’s head, “I guess I’ll just have to fight the terrible monster now, won’t I?”
Damien stopped shaking and looked quizzically up at his father. “What?”
Hawke smiled and ruffled the boy’s raven hair. “Tell you what, I’ll go make sure that monster is gone, and then I’ll tell you a story until you fall asleep, okay?” Damien nodded enthusiastically and Hawke tucked him back into the bed.
Crossing to the wardrobe Hawke remembered when his own father had done the same for him and his siblings when they were young. They had been scared that a terrible monster was scratching at the walls of their room trying to eat them. They had all run into their parent’s room, all frightened and describing different monster to their parents. Amused, Malcolm had taken Hawke outside and they looked for this terrible monster. Instead, they found a branch from a nearby tree scratching at the wall in the wind.
Embarrassed, Hawke tried to deny ever feeling afraid, but Malcolm explained that fear wasn’t something to be ashamed of. “Son, fear is not bad. Fear is simply your heart telling you to be careful. When you feel afraid, do not despair. Instead, you must decide if you want to master your fear, or let it master you.” Together they broke the branch off and threw it in the compost heap, telling Carver and Bethany the truth behind the noises.
Remembering his father’s kindness, Hawke paused in front of the wardrobe. “Damien, will you help me, please?” Damien retreated deeper into the quilt and shook his head. “Son, I know you fear whatever is in this closet. But, if you never find out the truth, you’ll be afraid the rest of your life. I promise to keep you safe, but I think you need to do this.”
Damien paused and slowly slipped out of the bed. He joined Hawke and together they opened the wardrobe. Inside, Damien’s clothes and few toys were stacked while a wilted flower in a vase stood beside it all. After thoroughly checking to make sure it was safe, the pair closed the door and reconvened at the bed.
“So, there was no monster? Michael told a lie?” Damien’s voice sounded stronger, although Hawke could hear the exhaustion in it.
“I don’t think so. I think Michael was scared, so he told a story to make himself feel better. Sometimes, fear makes us do that, make up stories that make our fears easier to hide.”
Smiling, Damien snuggled closer to Hawke and sleepily asked, “But you don’t do that, right? You’re the bravest da in the whole world.” Before Hawke could respond, Damien fell asleep.
Softly extricating his self, Hawke returned to his bed and slid back beneath the quilt. Turning to look at Anders he was surprised to see his love’s eyes open and a smile on his face. “You are the bravest da in the whole world, aren’t you?” Hawke chuckled leaned his forehead against Anders.
The pair stayed like that for a moment before Hawke blurted that he still had nightmares. “I have dreams of the spiders. In the Fade. They cover me and I can’t escape.”
Anders hummed and grabbed Hawke’s hand. “I know. Justice sometimes sees your dreams in the Fade. But you know they’re only dreams, right love? You can’t be hurt by them. Not anymore.”
Hawke waited a moment before pulling his hand out of Anders'. “I know that, Love. But I still have them. It’s been over three years, and I still have them.”
“I used to have nightmares about the Circle. All the things I saw, the stories I heard. There were times where I did not sleep for weeks. Now, I never have them.”
Hawke sat up and looked over at Anders, “How did you stop them? Did Justice stop them?”
Anders shook his head and sat up as well, leaning against Hawke. “No. At first I tried burying myself in work to stop them but it didn’t help. What did help, was you Hawke.”
“Me? How so?”
“Every time I had a nightmare, I would think of you and how kind you were, and how you promised me such grand things. Soon, I found myself so happy and warm that no nightmare could hope to hurt me.”
Hawke found himself smiling, remembering all the love he felt with Anders and Damien. He remembered Merrill and her inexhaustible enthusiasm, Isabela and Varric and their humor that always seemed to lift his spirits. Aveline and her steadfast assuredness that helped keep the group grounded. Even Fenris and his dry humor always serving as a counterpoint to the tragedy and darkness of their time together was a welcome source of love. And of course, the blonde mage who offered his whole heart to him, asking for nothing in return.
Turning to him now, Hawke kissed him deeply, drinking in his love like an elixir. Breaking the kiss, Hawke again ran his hand through Anders’ hair and lay back down. That night, the whole house slept soundly, each occupied with dreams of the ones they loved.
(Sorry if its not that good, I'm still really new at writing fic, hope you enjoyed it and have a great holiday!)