[TRC] Dog Days (PG, Kuro/Fai)
Jan. 1st, 2011 01:28 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mikkenekoTitle: Dog Days - Part 1
Rating: PG
Spoilers: AU.
Summary: On his way home from work one day, Fai encounters a stray dog and decides to feed it. Before long, he finds that he's made a friend -- one determined to stay by his side and protect him whether he likes it or not.
Author's Note: What astonished me about Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle is not so much the fact that this fandom has a story where Fai is - literally - a cat that Kurogane adopts… but that there's more than one. This is sort of my answer to that.
"Hello there, big doggie!" a cheerful voice called down the alleyway.
Kurogane's white-tipped ears flicked up at the sound, and he raised his chin from his paws to look up at whoever had dared to address him so casually. A growl started in his chest, but it was more habit than real anger, a low and almost uncertain rumbling in his ribcage and belly.
A tall, skinny man was standing at the end of the alley, a few steps off the street. His hair was light and flew in wisps around his face, and his laughing eyes were bright blue. Kurogane's ears flattened, and he pushed himself to all four feet even as he adopted a slinking, low-slung posture. He didn't know quite how to react. Most humans ignored him entirely, or looked afraid, unless they were shouting at him or chasing him away. He wasn't used to humans talking to him in friendly tones, at least not since -- Kurogane shuddered inside to think about it -- Master was gone.
"Good doggie," the stranger cooed in a sickeningly sweet voice. "Aren't you a handsome one, so big and black-furred. Oo's a good boy, oo's a good boy?"
Kurogane's growl increased, and he glared venomously at the stranger. He might not have a Master and a Den right now, but that didn't give random strange humans the right to baby-talk him.
At the same time, though, he hesitated to chase the man out of the alleyway, or make any threatening moves. This alleyway wasn't really his territory to begin with; he'd been on the move too long to really make a home for himself. And he was weak with hunger, having trouble scrounging enough to eat from the trash cans in these alleyways. He didn't feel up to a fight, not with the other city dogs, and not with this strange, stupid human. He crouched down a little lower, pressing the side of his body against the wall, and lowered his ears a little more. His entire posture eloquently spoke of, Leave me alone.
Far from taking a hint, though, the light-haired man took a few more steps into the alleyway. He was carrying a package that crinkled and smelled of plastic, and he crouched and leaned forward, his head almost at the level of Kurogane's as he stretched out one hand. "You haven't had enough to eat in a while, have you?" he said softly. "Poor guy. You're all alone. I guess you must have lost your people, if nobody is taking care of you. Or did they throw you out on the street to starve?"
Kurogane sniffed suspiciously in his direction, and relaxed his defensive posture as enticing smells made their way out of his bag. His ears perked up again despite himself, and he sniffed again. His growls shifted to soft whines.
"Here, I have something you can eat," the man announced, sitting back on his heels and reached into his plastic bag. "Lucky for you, I got paid today, so I can afford to spare a little bit of meat…"
He took out something that smelled delicious, wrapped in paper, and Kurogane could not stop himself from drooling as he deposited it on the alleyway floor. When he nosed aside the stiff, waxy paper, he found ground raw meat, cold but dripping with delicious bloody juices. He instantly forgave the man for the baby talk right there on the spot, and charitably decided that as humans went, this one wasn't so bad.
When the meat was all gone he snuffled around trying to find a last few crumbs, tail thumping against the alley floor as he licked the paper for the last of the juice. The man chuckled, his chin propped in his hands as he watched Kurogane fish around in the paper. "Still not enough…?" he asked.
"Try this," he said, digging back into his bag and pulling out a package of sausages, long tubular things with pinched-off ends tied with thread. "Who knows what all is in here, but you dogs can eat most kinds of meat, can't you?"
The sausages were a little harder to handle than the hamburger had been. He had to pick up each sausage by one end, then toss his head up to swallow the whole thing with a gulp. The pale-haired stranger laughed out loud to watch his antics, but Kurogane charitably decided to forgive him the indignity, at least right now.
Once the sausages were all gone, he looked up at the man hopefully, a small whine escaping him. "Sorry, that's all I have for now," he said regretfully. "Unless you can eat cheese as well?" He fished around in his bag for something else, broke off a chunk of some yellow, bitter-smelling substance and offered it. Kurogane sniffed the offering in his hand for a moment and took it, but although he mouthed it a few times, it tasted more like plastic than like food. He looked at the strange man in disgust, and snorted deep in his doggy chest.
The man laughed again. "Ah, well, guess I can't blame you, that's American cheese," he said.
He reached out with an empty hand, and although Kurogane was wary, this time he let the man's fingers brush across the top of his head, rub his ears. He had a nice touch -- gentle, maybe a bit on the wishy-washy side, tickling and irritating more than he satisfied.
Kurogane hated to admit it to himself, but had missed humans' touch.
Abruptly the light, tickling touch became too itchy, and Kurogane sat back abruptly and began to scratch behind his ear with a hind leg. The man laughed again and rose to his feet, to Kurogane's annoyance, brushing his hands off on his pants leg.
"I have to go now, big doggie," he said. "I'd better get home before dark. I hope you can find someone else to give you food, or find your people again."
With one final pat, the man turned towards the mouth of the alley and started off down the street. He didn't see the dark human figure, further back in the intersection, detach itself from the shadows and begin to follow him.
But Kurogane did.
Cautiously -- he was out of his territory, and he had learned to be wary of men who would try to catch him -- he slipped out of his pathetic excuse for a temporary den and sniffed down the street. The laughing man's smell-trail was easy to pick out, leading recent and steady away down the street. The darker, slightly sicker smell-trail of another human was overlaid on top, dirty and chemical, following close behind.
Kurogane snorted, sneezed, then leapt to his feet and began to follow them. There weren't many other humans on this street, and when he caught up to the two that had been following, he froze in place at the sound of human voices shouting.
The sick man had grabbed onto his human, who staggered backwards, crying out as the intruder grabbed his shoulders and shook him like a ragdoll. "Shut up and be quiet!" the dark figure was saying loudly. "Shut up and give me your money! All I want is your money. Do it or else you get hurt!"
"Calm down, okay, just calm down," he heard his human's voice, pleading in a way that darkened Kurogane's vision and made his lips lift in a snarl. "Look, I don't have any money, I spent it all on groceries. You can have them, okay? Just take them --"
"Fuck the goddamn groceries, man!" the dark figure yelled, lashing out with his arm and ripping the plastic bag, sending cans and packages bouncing everywhere. "I know you have cash! I heard you say you got paid today! Now gimme the fucking cash, or else --"
Fury blazed up in Kurogane's mind; a low growl began in his chest, building higher and higher as he crept forward, all his hair standing on end. How dare this filthy thug threaten his human? He would pay for this!
He leapt forward, his powerful leg muscles catapulting him across the distance. His jaws closed around the attacker's arm in an unbreakable grip, and the mugger screamed as sharp teeth ripped into the skin of his arm. He turned around, shaking his arm wildly, beating at his head as he tried to make Kurogane let go.
The light-haired man staggered back, arms full of ripped plastic and a look of shock on his face. He didn't see a wound, but Kurogane couldn't tell if he was injured or not, not through the smell of the attacker's blood filling his mouth and nose. He ignored the heavy blows to his face, bracing his large paws on the rough concrete and throwing all his substantial weight towards dragging the man backwards.
"Call off your dog! Call off your goddamn dog!" the man was crying hysterically, and the blond man just shook his head, hands fumbling in the pockets of his coat for a small silver object.
The mugger's flailing free arm found a discarded length of pipe lying against a wall, and he grabbed at it frantically, then swung it around to impact with a heavy thud on Kurogane's side. It was an awkward angle and didn't do as much damage as it could have, but it was enough to make Kurogane yelp loudly and lose his grip on the man's arm.
With his side smarting, and his mouth full of the nasty taste of the other man's blood, Kurogane scrambled around to place himself between the mugger and the blond human, who had the little metal disk up to his face now. For a moment, he licked his lips and hefted his makeshift weapon, but Kurogane's throat-ripping snarl stopped him in place.
"I'm calling the cops," the blond man said in a firm voice that shook only slightly. "You’d better get out of here, and don't come around this area looking for trip money again."
The mugger had been expecting an easy mark; the savage dog and the threatened cops were too much for him. The piece of pipe clattered to the ground as he turned and fled, stumbling and clutching his mauled arm with his good hand.
Kurogane stayed in a guard position long after the man's footsteps had gone, until the trail of blood he'd left behind began to cool. Then, finally, he sat down at the blond man's feet and bayed loudly in triumph. He'd defended his good person, and made a bad one run off like a wounded rabbit. Oh yeah, he was a bad-ass motherfucker.
"Good doggie," a faint voice came from behind him, and Kurogane's breath whuffed out of him in surprise as light, tentative hand touched his coat. He looked up into the human's eyes, bright blue and wide with shock. "Would… the brave black doggie like to stay with me tonight…?"
Good dog. It had been a long time since Kurogane had heard those words spoken to him, and he liked the sound of it. He flipped his nose up against the human's hand, leaving a smear of blood against his pale skin; but the man only hesitated before he reached over and scratched Kurogane's ears, much more satisfyingly this time.
Maybe, just maybe, Kurogane had found his new Master. He thought he could get to like this one.
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Part 2
Author's Note:
Those of my readers who are familiar with Pet Shop of Horrors will notice that Yuuko has stepped into the role of D, right down to the little dramatic lecture on the animal breeds' history and traits and how human beings have wronged them. I think this fits; D has no female relatives, but if he did, she would be Yuuko.
Those of my readers who are not familiar with Pet Shop of Horrors, what are you doing?! Go out and read it right now!
The next day, Fai dug out an address book and set off for the nearest animal shelter. The big black dog paced beside him, as neatly as though he'd been trained to heel, although Fai had no leash nor anything to use as one. Perhaps he had been trained, Fai thought. He was used to people, so he must have been someone's pet before he was abandoned on the street. Fai smiled, and reached down to ruffle his hand across the dog's silky ears, earning a growl. And you will be someone's pet again, he thought. You're a good dog, anybody would be lucky to have you. It's just too bad that I can't keep you myself.
He was grateful to the dog for protecting him, but his apartment was too small to keep a large animal, and he couldn't afford the responsibilities that came with a pet -- food and toys and medical care. As thanks for helping him, he'd give the dog to the proper authorities to care for him; they'd find a good home for him, someone who could care for and reward him properly.
He told himself that repeatedly as they walked the streets to the shelter, but Fai couldn't help but feel a little sadness in his heart at the thought of saying good-bye.
The shelter was smaller than he'd expected, just another street number in a crowded row of commercial buildings. The storefront was grey and dilapidated, but pasted with signs and notices in bright and cheery colors, and the windows were full of cages. Fai took a breath, looked down at the black dog, and then pushed the door open and went in.
The counter was staffed by a young woman, more of a girl really, with wispy ginger hair and bright green eyes. She looked up from her notebook and saw him, and her face brightened into a happy smile. "Hello!" she said. "What can I do for you today? Are you looking to adopt?"
Fai grinned back; it was hard not to return such a sweet and friendly smile. "Oh, hello," he said. "No -- I'd like to adopt, but I'm afraid I can't keep a pet. I actually came to bring this dog to the shelter. I was hoping you could care for him."
"Oh." The girl's eyes dropped to the black dog by his side, and her smile faded. "This is your dog?" she asked.
"Oh no, he's not mine," he said, smiling, and ruffling the dog's silky hair. "I found him on a street near my house, and he followed me home. He doesn't have a collar or any tags, so I thought he must be a stray. He helped me out big time last night!" he laughed.
"And you want to bring him here?" For some reason, the girl sounded a little unhappy with the prospect.
"Yes," he said, surprised by her demeanor; she had seemed like such a friendly sort. "I can't keep a dog, but I thought the least I could do was get him off the street and to some shelter, so he can be adopted by a family that cares for him. Is something wrong?"
"Well..." the girl said, and bit her lip, her green eyes troubled. "To tell you the truth, I don't think this one has a very good chance of being adopted."
"What? Why not?" Fai said, bewildered. "He's smart and brave -- he'd make a wonderful guard dog for anybody."
"Well, he's an adult," she said reluctantly. "Animals have a hard time finding homes once they're not cute puppies and kittens any more. And he looks like he's part pit bull, which makes it even harder; a lot of people think that pit bulls are dangerous and don't want them near their children. A lot of pit bulls get abandoned when their owners move, and a pit bull who's found loose on the street makes a lot of people upset. Usually somebody calls animal services to come and get rid of them."
Fai was shocked -- he hadn't expected that the shelter wouldn't take him in. The dog turned and nudged hard against Fai's thighs, growling softly, as if sensing his distress. Fai put a hand on his warm fur for steadiness as the girl continued.
"On top of that, this guy is so big, you couldn't keep him in an apartment and it would be hard even in a house with a small yard. Not many people here in the city would have room for an animal this size. To be honest, we don't really have the room here, either. A large dog needs a lot of space, exercise, and food. We just don't have the resources to care for an animal this size indefinitely; we have to think about the needs of the other animals who need help. If he's just a lost dog we could keep him for a little while, while we try to find his owners... but if nobody comes to claim him within a week or so, we'd have to put him down," the girl finished, nearly in tears.
The girl took a deep breath and picked up her pen, her face tightly pinched, and tried to smile. "But maybe we can find his family before that happens," she said, forcing bright cheer. "So, maybe if you could tell us where you picked him up?"
"No!" Fai said quickly. He got down on his knees and put his arms around the dog's neck, feeling the growls reverberate through his ribs. "That won't be necessary. I'll take him home with me. He can be mine."
"Are you sure?" the girl asked anxiously. "I mean -- you seem to know each other pretty well already, but… a lot of houses in the city don't allow pit bulls at all. Is your landlord going to be okay with it?"
"I'm sure he won't mind," Fai assured her, thinking himself lucky for a change that Ashura never gave a damn about anything that went on in his building. If he hadn't bothered to shut down his upstairs neighbors who were running a cockfighting ring out of their apartment, he doubted the man would care much about a new dog, no matter what the breed.
"Well… in that case, great!" The unhappiness on her face cleared, and the girl beamed at him again. "How about this? If you sign him into the shelter and then fill out a form to adopt him right away, then you'll be covered under our triple-A policy - Adult Animal Adoption. That means we'll give him his rabies and other vaccines, and a voucher for pet food that can be redeemed at any store. And you can get any of the equipment that we sell in the store for half-price. Would that help?"
"Oh, yes," Fai said gratefully; to be honest, he didn't know how else he was going to be able to afford vet bills. His head was spinning with the import of his impulsive decision, and worries about how he was going to be able to adapt to this sudden change; but he couldn't have just let his savior be packed off to die.
"I'm so excited for you both!" the girl was babbling, as she dug into her stack of paperwork and handed him a dauntingly long form and a pen. "I'm sure you'll be really close friends. You won't regret this, not for the rest of both of your lives!"
Looking down at the white-tipped ears, and the steady red eyes that returned his gaze, Fai hoped that she would turn out to be right.
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On his way home from the shelter, with the black dog walking beside him, Fai kept an eye out for a pet store where he could use the coupon. The quickest route home cut through Chinatown, and many of the familiar stores Fai knew were nowhere to be found in this region. When at last he saw a sign that was written in English, proclaiming itself Count D's Pet Shop, he turned his steps towards it and slowed to a stop outside the door.
He stared at the shopfront for a little while, taking in the elaborate architecture. This wasn't like any pet store he'd seen before. But all pet stores must sell pet food, wouldn't they? He looked around for a sign that would say whether or not animals were allowed inside, but didn't see any; but he didn't have a leash to tie the dog outside, either.
"Welcome," a rich voice floated out to him from the interior of the shop. "Please, do come in."
"Is it all right to bring my dog inside?" Fai called back, peering a little uncertainly into the dark interior.
The voice gave a little chuckle. "Yes, you may come inside with him," it replied. As if in response to the invitation, the dog pushed his way inside the shop; Fai followed on his heels.
Once inside he rocked to a stop. Unlike the cages of animals or rows of pet products he was expecting, the room inside was furnished like a parlor or living room, beautifully decorated in the Chinese style. There were several rich couches arranged around a low table, where tea and sweets had been set out. Lounging on one of the low couches was a beautiful Asian woman in a cheongsam, with elaborately dressed hair.
"Welcome," the woman said again, her voice almost a sensuous purr.
"I'm sorry," he began automatically, backing a step towards the door. "I thought -- this is a pet store?"
"Yes, we do sell pets here," she replied pleasantly. "Pets of all kinds -- common pets and exotic, to pets that you would not believe exist outside your wildest dreams. We sell not only pets here, but hopes and dreams -- and wishes, if you can meet the price."
"My grandfather is overseas on business," she said smoothly. "I am looking after the shop while he's gone. My name is Yuuko. What can I help you with? Surely," her eyes dropped to the dog, who was sitting on his haunches and staring at her, "you have no need of an additional companion, with this brave warrior by your side."
While the black-haired boy with glasses took the voucher and filled Fai's order, the strange woman Yuuko pushed herself up on the divan and regarded the dog with heavy-lidded interest. He stared fearlessly back at her, his breath making low grunting noises in his chest, but then he yawned, displaying sharp white teeth, in a gesture of disinterest. "A warrior spirit indeed," she said.
"Yes," Fai said, thinking back to the way the dog had protected him the night before. "He's strong, too. The girl at the shelter said that he was part pit bull?"
"Partly," Yuuko agreed. "But the stronger part of his blood comes from his other heritage. He is a Shiba Inu, the Japanese working dogs."
"A shiba inu?" Fai was surprised. "I thought they were much smaller."
"Purebred shiba inus are, but this one gets his size from his pit blood. Even for that, he's remarkably large," Yuuko remarked. "But you can see the shiba heritage in the tail, here, and the markings on the chest and feet, which are known as urajiro. There are three major breeds of shiba inus; the shinshu, which is the most common in the United States today, the mino, and the sanin. This child comes from the sanin bloodline, which is unusual; between the bombings in Japan that killed thousands, and the distemper epidemic that followed, very few of them survived the second world war.
"This child is the last son of a dying clan." Her voice went quieter on the last words, her eyes sad where they rested on the dog. Then she sat up, looked back up to him, and her voice became brisker. "If he were a purebred, he would be priceless to the right collector. Perhaps it's just as well that he is a mix, so that you would not be tempted."
The way she said that made Fai uncomfortable, as though she knew exactly how desperate his money situation was. "I don't feel like he would be mine to sell, anyway," Fai said, feeling slightly defensive. "I just fed him one time and he followed me home of his own free will. I only filled out the adoption forms so that he wouldn't be taken by the pound or put down."
Yuuko smiled, and there was something in that smile that seemed like she knew what he had been thinking. "Shibas are known for their intelligence, protectiveness, and willingness to work hard," she said, "but their most notable trait is their intense loyalty. They are not like other dogs, who will choose a clan or family of people and defend them like a pack. Instead, they bond with one specific person. Like the samurai warriors of old, they choose one person to be their master, and they will protect that person with their life."
The black-haired boy came up to him with his package, then, and Fai took it gratefully, holding the heavy bag of dog food like a shield between them. The dog got up from his seated position, and came quickly to heel at Fai's side. Fai hesitated a moment, looking around the pet store. "Is there anything else I should get for him?" he asked a little reluctantly. "Like a collar, or a leash so I can tie him places…"
"I wouldn't recommend it," Yuuko said in an indifferent voice. "If you command him to stay, he'll stay -- unless he thinks you're in danger. Then there is no lock or leash that could keep him from your side."
"Well, in that case… thank you for everything, I think," Fai said, somewhat bewildered by the strangeness of this whole transaction. He went back out onto the street, carrying his heavy bag and with the dog trotting beside him; it wasn't until he got home and opened the package that he found his dog food voucher from the vet tucked inside, unused.
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Part 3
Author's Note: Please note that a responsible pet owner should always be sure to neuter their pets, and a large and potentially dangerous dog like Kurogane (and we know that he is dangerous!) ought not to be allowed to run around loose. But, we'll forgive Fai here because it's Kurogane.
Fai named the dog Kurogane. He'd heard somewhere that it meant 'black' in Japanese, which seemed appropriate, since the mysterious pet store owner -- Yuuko -- had told him the dog was part shiba. But the name rarely got used in that form; he just as often called the dog "puppy" or "doggie" or "woof-woof," since Kurogane responded the same way to his voice no matter what name he used.
Living with Kurogane was a revelation to Fai; it opened a whole new world up to his eyes. In some ways it was much easier than he'd feared, since Kurogane was an adult dog and not a puppy. He didn't need to be housetrained, he already responded well to commands, and he was mature and restrained enough not to cause havoc in Fai's house or chew up his clothes. He accepted the worn-out beanbag and layers of old coats and blankets that Fai offered him as a bed with deliberate dignity, and settled about the business of disguising the original color with layer on layer of black dog hair.
Kurogane was incredibly smart; he constantly surprised Fai with how much he could do, and how much he was able to understand. He was able to open any cabinet, drawer, or door which was not locked. Within a few days of settling at Fai's home, he recognized all of the items in the apartment by name, and was willing to pick many of them up and carry them over to Fai on request.
He seemed to know the difference between Fai really wanting something and Fai giving him commands just to watch him do it, though, and would pointedly ignore Fai during those times. In fact, Kurogane seemed perfectly capable of ignoring any of Fai's commands that he didn't think were 'right.' He was stubborn and willful, not exactly the picture of eager obedience that Fai had always associated with dogs. Kurogane did what he wanted, when he wanted, which only sometimes happened to coincide with what Fai wanted him to do.
Fai talked to his new dog almost constantly; it was such a relief having another living being nearby that he couldn't help himself. He was sure that Kurogane understood much of what he said, although whether he bothered to listen was another question; Kurogane spent much of his time that he was in the apartment completely ignoring Fai. At times, though, he would growl or let out a low woof in response to something Fai had said, almost as though carrying on a conversation.
Word quickly got around the neighborhood about Fai's new dog, which according to rumor had nearly torn someone's arm off defending him. The amount of respect his neighbors paid to him increased dramatically, and Fai never came back from the restaurant where he worked to find his ground-floor apartment broken into again. Except for when he was at work, Kurogane accompanied Fai everywhere he went outside the apartment. It made a huge difference having the big black dog by his side; Fai no longer felt threatened by any of the lurking figures in alleyways or shadows. He felt much freer to go out during the day, or stay out longer after dark.
With a new and uncharacteristic boldness, he began to explore the area around his home, for the first time getting to know and developing a fondness for the city he lived in. Finding new places, with Kurogane by his side, made the next few months an exciting adventure. He even found a small green park a few blocks away where he could take Kurogane to play. A cheap Frisbee and some tennis balls were all the equipment they needed for endless games of chase and fetch, although they lost Frisbees about as frequently as Kuro's strong jaws clamped down too hard and collapsed the tennis balls. If nothing else was handy, there were always sticks.
Although Kurogane loved to chase and catch, he was not very big on the 'fetch' aspect of things; he plainly thought that if Fai wanted his toy back, he was going to have to come and get it. Fai retaliated by playing keep-away, holding the toy high over his head where Kurogane couldn't reach it. This enticed Kurogane to chase him through the park, much to the alarm of any other park-goers at the sight of the huge black dog growling threateningly, and knocking the slender young man over as his jaws snapped at Fai's hands.
Despite what the shelter girl had said about pit bulls, Fai was never worried that Kurogane might hurt him; he knew Kurogane far too well, and for all his strength and potential ferocity, he had never hurt Fai even by accident. At times, when they were lying together on the grass and both panting from exertion, he would remember what the lady at the pet shop had told him about the loyalty of Shiba Inus; that they picked one master and stayed with them forever. He would close his eyes and bury his face against Kuro's thick black fur, as the dog's warm wet tongue lapped against his hand, and hope it was true.
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Kurogane stood on his hind legs and used his nose to bump aside the latch of the bathroom window from the outside. Gathering his powerful leg muscles under him, he sprang up and over the windowsill, landing on the inside with barely a bump. He was even able to pull the window shut after him with his jaws, not liking the cold damp drafts that came in under the doors if he didn't. No point in having an inside den, after all, if the weather was going to be like outside.
He jumped from the sink to the floor with a thump, and his claws ticked on the tile as he padded out into the main room from the bathroom. He was feeling very pleased with himself right now; he'd gotten into an argument with two ambitious schnauzers and even a stray Doberman who'd all been looking to expand into this block. He'd won, of course; now that he had regular food and a place to sleep -- and a territory worth defending -- no mangy mutt was going to be able to stand up against him.
A quick glance around confirmed what his nose had already assured him; his den was safe and secure, all was as it should be. His new den was spacious and warm, and he was able to come and go as he pleased. His master was home, which was a little unusual at this hour but not displeasing. As far as Kurogane was concerned, his master worked far too hard, and often came back to the den too tired to want to go to the park and play.
Aside from that detail, though, Kurogane couldn't be more pleased with his current set-up. His master was lovely, friendly and attentive and always willing to play, except when he was exhausted from work. Sure, he had a few qualities that Kurogane would knock out of him if he could -- like the fact that he chattered meaninglessly all the time, and that he insisted on hugging Kurogane when he'd made it clear that he didn't like it -- but Kurogane was willing to defend him against all comers. His master belonged to him and nobody else. At least there had been no talk in all his master's chatter about trying to take him to the V-E-T for the painful unmanning operation that so many of the street dogs had been subjected to. If he had, then Kurogane would have had to take steps.
Thinking of his master, he looked around the little apartment; normally he'd be in the kitchen, making delicious smells come out of the various wall boxes, but there was no sign of him. Poking his head around the doors, Kurogane eventually found his master in the bedroom, and why? It was too early to go to sleep.
His master was seated on the bed, and his hands were wrapped around the phone, but he wasn't talking into it. He was just sitting there, holding it in his lap, and his expression was strange, somehow empty and flat. Kurogane's concern increased; normally his master was happy and smiling, or making even stranger faces. It wasn't right for him to look so empty. Something was wrong.
He went over to his master and pushed his head into his lap, huffing softly to get his attention. When that didn't work, he impatiently swatted the man's leg with his paw. His master needed to tell him what was wrong, so that he could go out and rip the throat out of whatever had made him so sad.
Slowly, his master raised his face until he could focus on Kurogane. "Kuro," he said in a dull voice, for once not attaching any of the stupid nicknames to the end of it. "You're back."
His voice was all wrong too, quiet and flat, not happy and bubbly at all. Kurogane jumped up onto the bed beside his master, disdaining the "no puppy on the covers!" rule entirely, and settled down against his master's side, looking intently into his face. His master's fingers slid into his coat, curling against the good scratching-spots, but his face was turned away, staring off to the side.
"I've heard it said that suicide runs in families," he said quietly. "Or that it's contagious, like a disease. If you know someone who's killed themselves… if it's happened to someone in your family… the more you see it, the more you think about it, the more it gets into your head, and the more likely it is that you'll try to kill yourself, too. I don't know if that's really true, but I don't know how else to explain it, unless I really am under a curse.
"I used to have a family -- a father and mother, and a twin brother, Yuui. One day when we came home from school, we found Mother in the bedroom. She'd hanged herself. We didn't know why… even now I still don't know why, but I'll never forget it, opening that door, calling out, and then seeing… one shoe had fallen off, and she was wearing her nice dressy socks, the ones with the flowers on them. Why do I still remember that? I don't remember what her face looked like -- I don't -- but I remember that.
"When we were freshmen in high school, my brother killed himself. We'd been bullied at school ever since we were children, and I guess he just couldn't take it anymore. He locked himself in the bathroom -- we had to call the police to break down the door. The police wouldn't let me near, wouldn't let me see. I still don't know which is better… seeing or not seeing…
"And now my father just blew his brains out." The words sounded like they were dragged out of his throat, and his eyes were sparkling with tears. "We weren't close -- I hadn't seen him since my last year of high school, when he found out I was gay, when he threw me out of the house. We'd never even spoken since then, and now I find out… he was the last of my family, and I found out because his neighbor heard the shot, and came to see if he was okay -- and I --"
"I'm the last one now," he choked out, and the tears began pouring down his face. "I'm alone. I don't have any family, I don't have anyone. She said the… the funeral is on Thursday, and I… oh, Kuro, I don't… I don't even have enough money to buy a plane ticket to go to his funeral…"
He broke down into sobs, burying his face against Kurogane's neck, his hands clutching in the spiky black hair as he cried. The dog endured it patiently, pressed his warm furry body against his master's, and licked the tears away from where they fell onto his hands. It was all he could do; it was enough.
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Part 4
Author's Note: Gosh, for all that this started out as a fluffy AU, I pretty much made Fai's life suck as hard as it possibly could with no curses or magical imprisonment involved. He's got no money, he has a crap job and lives in the bad part of town, his family's all dead and he has no friends. Meeting Kurogane was pretty much the only good thing that ever happened to him.
Soon enough, summer gave way to autumn, and the city became colder. Fai's heating bills began going up, and he was struggling to meet rent payments as it was. He constantly worried about having enough food for Kuro; he was a big dog, and needed to eat almost as much as Fai himself. At least he was no longer a young, growing dog.
Thanks to a tip he'd received from Sakura, the pretty young volunteer at the shelter, for a while he was able to get dog food at a local charity that donated food and other goods to pet owners in financial trouble. It was humiliating to have to rely on a charity, but Kurogane needed to eat, and that was more important than his own pride. Gradually, though, even their stocks of available dog food were dipping low, and every day Fai had to put a little less in Kuro's bowl.
The guilt racked at him; he had adopted Kuro, and thus taken responsibility for him. He felt like he was failing him. He searched his mind for some other way to get more money, or find cheaper food, but couldn't think of anything.
Kurogane often went out in the evenings; he let himself in and out through Fai's back window, the one with the broken lock. Fai had long ago given up trying to stop him; Kurogane could open any latch or seal he tried to put on it. His collar and tags showed that he had all his shots up to date, anyway, so hopefully he wouldn't get picked up by the pound; and he always came home.
He entered Fai's apartment with a rattle and a thump, walked into the room licking his chops, then went into the kitchen to drink noisily from the water bowl. Fai got up to fill his bowl with food; his throat tightened as he poured the last of the bag of dry food into the bowl, barely filling it to half its level. Taking the pathetic offering, he put it on the floor next to the water bowl. "Here, Kuro," he called softly. "Sorry this is all there is tonight. Tomorrow I should get paid, so I can go and buy another bag, but for tonight, just bear with it, okay?"
Kurogane glanced over at the bowl, then snuffed and turned away from it, showing no interest at all. Instead he padded over to the bed, the one that Fai had made from a beanbag and old coats, and stepped into it, turning around twice before flopping down with a loud huffing noise.
Fai was confused. This was Kurogane's usual after-dinner routine; he was behaving as though he'd already eaten, but he hadn't eaten anything. Confusion gave way to concern. He picked up the bowl and carried it over to Kurogane, setting it beside his head. "What's wrong?" he asked, as though Kurogane could somehow answer him. "This is the same as usual, I promise; it hasn't gone bad or anything, even if there isn't as much."
Kurogane turned to sniff at the bowl, then yawned loudly, licking his chops as though he'd just eaten a substantial meal. He turned his back on the bowl of food, and settled back down with a contented sigh. He didn't act in the least bit hungry, although breakfast had been scanty that day too, and he'd been out all day…
Realization began to dawn on Fai. "Kuro-tan," he said. "Are you trying to tell me that you've already eaten? That you're finding food elsewhere?"
Kurogane raised his head to look at him, and whuffed in a tone that was a mixture of exasperation and satisfaction, as though Fai was a dim six-year old who'd just grasped a simple concept. He yawned again, and deliberately put his head down and closed his eyes.
Overwhelming relief filled Fai, and he reached out to put his arms around Kurogane and hug him close. The dog tolerated it, for a change; normally he didn't like to be hugged or restrained for more than a few seconds. "I'm sorry I can't do better, Kuro-tan," Fai said, voice muffled against Kurogane's shoulder. "Just keep coming back, okay? Don't forget this is where you live."
Kurogane pressed his cold nose against the side of Fai's neck for a moment, as if agreeing; then he began to growl and struggle to get away.
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As the autumn deepened into winter, the worsening economy plunged the downtown area where Fai lived into a depression. People started eating out less and less, and the tips from the remaining patrons dwindled almost to nothing, leaving him with a base salary of barely four dollars an hour. To try to make up the difference, Fai began working longer and longer hours; coming in early or staying long after close to sweep and clean the kitchens at the restaurant.
He made a few tries at finding a new job; but all of the other businesses in the area were in the same boat, and he couldn't search too far abroad. Unless he could find a job close to the major public transit centers, he wouldn't be able to commute from home; he couldn't afford a car. He quickly realized he was lucky to have any job at all, without a college degree or even a high school diploma to his name. By the end of December, he estimated that he could just barely make rent for January if he traded with some of the other wait staff to work all the Christmas shifts; for once, not having anyone to share the holidays with worked to his advantage.
His small pile of savings shrank rapidly as the weather grew colder, and Fai soon was forced to decide between buying food or paying for heat. Thanks to the combination of cold temperatures and overwork, he developed a cold and cough. He felt a little guilty about continuing to work in food service with a cough, but he didn't know what else to do; he couldn't take time off work, and he couldn't afford a doctor. He compromised by buying cough suppressants to keep the cough down while he was waiting tables. But those ate into his cash flow as well, and they didn't really cure the cold, just suppressed the symptoms.
On the morning of December 31st he woke up with a pounding headache and a feeling like a thick suffocating blanket wrapped around his throat and chest. He struggled to his feet and the room tilted dangerously around him; vertigo and dizziness sloshed in his inner ear.
I have to get to work, he thought. I can't afford to miss a day. He staggered over to the sofa and sat down hard, head hanging. He lifted his head a few moments later, noting with confusion how the room swam in his vision. He was thirsty. I'll get a drink of water when I get to work, he promised himself. No, I'll get one now, it's a long cold walk to the restaurant. He struggled to his feet and staggered into the bathroom, pouring himself a glass of water and drinking it.
The water tasted strange in his mouth, and moments later he was on his knees on the tiled floor, retching into the basin. He coughed and wiped his mouth, then used the sink to pull himself to his feet. I don't have time for this. I have to get to work!
Groping for his keys, took a step forward, then lost his footing and fell, landing with a bone-jarring crash. As he lay on the floor, half-stunned, his thoughts began to wander. He began to believe that he was already at work, stacking dishes on the cart in preparation for his shift. He went to load coffee into the grinder for the morning crowd, then suddenly remembered that he had to buy dog food for Kurogane on his way home. "Stupid of me to forget," he mumbled to himself, talking to the swizzle sticks that were lined up on the shelf. "I could have just gotten it on the way to work this morning... Wait a minute, I didn't go to work this morning..."
He came to himself on the floor of his apartment, with Kurogane whining and licking at his hands. Lying on the unprotected floor was chilling him fast, but he began to feel cold with fear, as well. Something was very wrong. I have to get up... I have to go to work, I have to buy food for Kuro...
Something hard bumped against his hand; with an effort he managed to focus his eyes on the length of his arm, and saw a slightly tooth-marked bottle of water brushing his fingertips. Kurogane pawed at his elbow, then nudged the bottle against his hand with his broad nose. "Clever Kuro-boo," Fai crooned at him, as he fumbled shakily with the top of the bottle. "How did you know I was thirsty?"
He got the top off, spilling water all over himself and the carpet in the process, and swallowed greedy gulps. Almost immediately, his stomach rebelled; this time he was barely able to make his feet and stagger the few steps to the kitchen sink before he threw it all back up again. This time, the retching didn't stop even when all the water was gone, and the fluid he spat into the sink was bright green. What the hell have I been drinking? I didn't even eat anything funny last night, Fai wondered crazily, as he sank slowly to the floor again.
Enough was enough, he decided. Green fluids were a bad, bad sign. He needed to go to the hospital. After several false starts, he managed to crawl on his hands and knees across the apartment floor, Kurogane at his side practically pushing him along. "Kuro," he croaked out. "…get… phone."
As he approached the bedroom door, Kurogane seemed to realize what he wanted and raced ahead, coming back a few seconds later with the cell phone and dropping it in front of Fai's hands. Fai clutched at the small object, fingers fumbling with the buttons, and it took him several moments to realize that the small grey screen wasn't coming up no matter what buttons he pressed. The phone was dead -- he'd left it off the charger last night, and the aging battery wouldn't hold more than a few hours' charge.
The phone fell out of his hands with a clatter, and Fai collapsed onto the floor, too stunned and exhausted to move. He was shivering with cold, exposed on the cold floor, and he curled into a ball, trying to warm himself up again. Kurogane paced around him, whining anxiously and pawing at his sleeves. He knew that his dog was right, he had to get up, get moving, but his arms and legs just wouldn't respond to him. Kurogane was warm, nice and warm -- he clutched at his dog's fur with clumsy hands, trying to get close enough to curl up around him.
Kurogane's whimpers escalated to full-throated howls, and as Fai drifted off, listening to them, he wondered if anyone would hear them and come to see what was wrong. Somehow, he doubted it. Aside from Kurogane, nobody knew who he was, or cared; Kurogane was all that he had. "…Kuro…." he mumbled deliriously, his teeth chattering. "…help me…"
Somewhere very far away, at the end of a long tunnel, he heard the dog's howling resolve into angry cursing. Strong hands grabbed him; strong arms lifted him. The sudden change of position caused the blood to rush away from Fai's head, and he passed out.
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More author's notes:
Fai's hallucinatory episode is based on one that really happened to a friend of mine; apparently if you get sick enough that you can't keep down water and get reeeeally dehydrated, weird shit starts to happen to you, including hallucinations, and throwing up pure bile (bright green.) Fortunately one of the things my friend did in her confusion was to call her husband at work, who immediately called an ambulance for her, and she's fine now.
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Part 5 (Ending)
Author's Note: We're not going to think too hard about the implications of this.
Fai woke to the sound of his apartment's heater chugging noisily along, although he was sure he'd turned it off and hadn't run it in days. The difference of temperature in his apartment was notable; he could feel the warm air like a caress on his cheek.
But only on his face; the rest of him, he slowly realized, was under warm blankets in his own bed. There were even hot water bottles tucked under his knees and on his stomach, and he didn't even remember owning any of those. His pillows were stacked up behind him, half-propping him up in the warm nest; the position kept the irritating fluid from moving up in his chest and wanting to cough. He felt weak, but lucid again; also hungry and thirsty.
Noise and movement from the living room made Fai stiffen up warily in his covers; someone was in his apartment. Obviously, someone had come in while he was sick and moved him to his bed; someone who was still here now. But who? He vaguely remembered trying to call emergency services, but if an ambulance had come, surely he would be in a hospital right now and not in his own bedroom. His landlord, then, or one of his neighbors? It seemed unlikely, but he couldn't think of any other explanation.
Footsteps approached, and Fai's eyes widened as a figure filled the doorway, then straightened up after having to duck his head under the lintel. He was dressed in a long black trench coat over a dark red shirt and black pants, heavy work boots that scraped over Fai's floor with every step. The man was a total stranger, and he was huge, tall and broad-shouldered and heavy with muscle; Fai shrank back against the pillow as he approached the bed.
As the man stepped into the light of the bedside lamp, Fai was sure he'd never seen him before -- there was no way he could have forgotten that face. His hair was jet black and gleamed in the lamplight, and his features were strikingly handsome, eastern and angular. His sharp eyes, pinning Fai back against the bed, were an unusual reddish color -- but as strange as they were, Fai could almost swear that he'd seen something like them before.
"Who are you?" he demanded shakily. "How did you get in here? Where's -- where's Kurogane ?" He glanced around in a sudden panic, looking for the dark shadow of his guard dog. Kurogane would never have let a dangerous-looking stranger just walk in off the street like this; Kurogane would protect him while he was sick, he was sure.
The big man made a hmph noise, and stepped to Fai's bedside; he realized for the first time that the man was carrying a tray with a steaming mug of liquid, as he nudged aside things on the table to make room. Hands free, he turned again and pinned Fai with his gaze; not hostile, but incredibly intense. When he spoke, his voice was a deep bass rumble, almost a growl. "I've been here the whole time," he said. "I'm Kurogane , of course."
"What?" Fai demanded incredulously, then shook his head. "That's ridiculous! Kurogane is a dog."
"I know," the stranger said with a quiet rumble. "You named me. I am Kurogane ."
Oh, God. He didn't just have any hobo off the street invading his home and molesting him while he was sick; this guy was a genuine loony -- either hopped up on drugs or discharged from some mental ward, if not both at once. "Oh, that's nice," he chirped brightly, pasting a bright smile on his face as his shaking hands fumbled across the bedside table in pursuit of his cell phone; he had to call for help, now. The shaking spread up his arms as he struggled against the heavy covers until his whole body was trembling, reminding him that he was still sick, and very weak.
A large hand descended on the cell phone an inch ahead of his own hand, blocking his grab for it. The big man cut a glance down at the phone, then grunted and took his hand off it, transferring his grip to Fai's hand instead, lifting his arm off the bedcovers. "I know it's hard for you to believe, but it's true. I remember the day that we met, in April of this year in the alley not far from here. You gave me hamburgers and sausages, and then tried to feed me some fake shit that was half plastic. I remember every day that we've spent together since then. Want to ask me about any of them? I can answer anything you throw at me."
Fai's breath caught. Could it be? The only alternative was that he had a truly creepy stalker who'd been watching him obsessively every day since April, or… "No -- I -- I'm sorry, but this just can't be possible…"
The man gave a little grunt of annoyance, like the huffs of exasperation that Kurogane the dog had so often let out. He shifted position, crouching down to kneel beside the bed. "You don't believe me," the man -- Kurogane ? -- said, more of a statement than a question. His red eyes slid shut, and he brought Fai's captured hand up to his mouth; and then a warm, wet tongue slid over Fai's hands, wet heat enveloping each of his fingers and then trailing up the inside of Fai's wrist.
Fai's eyes widened, the hair standing up on the back of his neck; what his mind didn't want to believe, the memories of his nerves and skin insisted must be true. It felt familiar, too familiar, the way the warm longue lapped against his palm. This was his one and only Kuro-tan.
Kurogane 's eyes opened again, meeting Fai's gaze. "Now would be a good time for you to start believing in magic," the big man said.
"How?" Fai whispered. "Why?"
"The why should be obvious, even to an idiot like you," Kurogane said as he lifted his head; and Fai felt a bemused shock at the insult. Weren't dogs supposed to be respectful to their masters? "You don't take care of yourself, you let yourself get so sick you couldn't walk straight. What is it with humans? You're around food all day but you won't eat any of it, you figure out how to heat your homes all through winter but you turn it off and freeze instead. No one but a human could possibly get his head so turned around that he let himself go like this.
"As for the how…" Kurogane trailed off, his eyebrows pinched in uncertainty, as if unsure what to say -- or how much. "You remember Yuuko, don't you? At the Count's pet shop. Her motto is that she sells dreams, and makes wishes come true. Well, that's not just limited to human dreams and wishes, you know. I couldn't take care of you as a dog any more. So I wished to become a man."
Fai nodded slowly. He remembered the disconcerting Yuuko, and the strange pet shop that he'd visited on the day after he met Kurogane. Despite all his better judgment he was beginning to believe, but his stunned brain could not wrap around the consequences.
Kurogane took advantage of his weakness and shoved the tray towards him, picking up the mug and thrusting it in his face. "Drink," he said. "You need fluid."
"I'll just throw it back up --" Fai protested weakly, but Kurogane shook his head.
"You won't. Not this," he said. "I got this tea from Yuuko, it has sugar and nutrients that your body needs right now. You need the warmth, too. Even with every damn blanket in this place on you, your body can't conserve the heat it's not producing."
Too confused to argue, Fai took the tea in one shaking hand and drank it; the taste was odd, but it did seem to settle in his stomach and didn't immediately threaten to come back up. "You seem to know a lot about medicine, for a dog," he said softly.
Kurogane snorted in disgust, an affectation at once so familiar and so strange that Fai's heart clenched. Would he never see his familiar Kuro-tan again? He didn't know what to think, or feel. "There would be no point to having a dog's mind in a man's body, would there," he grumbled. "I wished to be human, so now I am, inside and out. There are a lot of things I understand a lot better now. And there's one thing that I know hasn't changed."
"And what's that?" Fai said, his voice tired and hopeless, chest aching.
Swift hands plucked the half-empty mug out of his grasp and replaced it on the nightstand; in a moment Kurogane was up on the bed, his hands braced on either side of Fai's hips on the covers. That piercing, compelling gaze was back on him, and Fai felt a vertigo, like he was falling forward into Kurogane 's eyes.
"I know that I love you, you idiot," Kurogane said, his voice rich with a deep, unshakeable conviction. "And I know that as long as you want me by your side, I'll be here, until we both die. You're mine to protect, mine to take care of, and mine to love."
A sudden rush of heat that had nothing to do with hot water bottles or tea filled Fai's body, and his face flooded scarlet. There could be no question that Kurogane 's human body was attractive, incredibly so, and Fai had been alone for a very long time. But there was more to it than that.
Ever since Fai had come to the realization that he was gay, he had always felt a hidden sense of shame, of guilt for being something that he was not supposed to be. His tentative experiments with other boys in high school had been secret, guilty things, both of them aware of how forbidden it was to act on these desires. His father's rejection and estrangement had only cemented the idea that he was unnatural and twisted.
Even after he'd moved to the city, he hadn't been able to shake the persistent feelings of guilt; and the few men he'd formed associations with in the gay community had similar pasts, similar neuroses and insecurities. Even his straight friends and coworkers who accepted him did so with a hint of pity and mindfulness, as though his love for men was a deviance that could just barely be tolerated.
But Kurogane -- Kurogane said he loved him, and he did so with such passionate conviction that there could be no question how far he meant that love to go. In his voice and his eyes, the heat and presence of his body, there was not the slightest hint of regret or shame for what he'd said, or for what he felt. He believed, truly believed without a hint of reservation, that loving Fai was the right thing to do, and he expected to be loved in returned without the slightest shame or misgivings. That utter confidence and certainty was something that Fai had never experienced, and it was more stimulating than anything he'd ever felt before.
Kurogane leaned in to nuzzle his cheek, then dragged his tongue up the side of Fai's jawbone, leaving a cool trail behind. Fai shivered, feeling another flush of heat, but then tried to draw away. "You shouldn't -- you're human now, and I'm contagious, you'll probably get sick --" Fai objected.
"Like I care about that," Kurogane snorted disparagingly. "As I said, I'm going to take care of you."
"What are you going to do?" Fai said softly. After the unbelievable events of the day, he was half afraid to close his eyes, for fear that it would all turn out to be a dream. Or else Kurogane 's transformation would turn out to be only temporary, and he would revert to a dog at midnight, or at dawn. He'd only just met the man that his beloved Kuro-tan had become, and hardly knew him, but he was already sure he didn't want to lose him.
Kurogane took his question literally, though. "You rest," he said, "and I take care of you. You'll stay in bed for as long as it takes until you're completely healed."
"No, I can't, my job --" Fai said, but Kurogane cut him off.
"You're not going back to that job," he growled angrily, eyes narrowing just like Kuro-tan's used to. "They work you to death and don't even pay you minimum wage -- they don't deserve you. When you are better, we'll find you a new job, one that pays you decent money and doesn't treat you like shit. In the meantime, I'll work."
"Doing what?" Fai asked disbelievingly. He wasn't sure what practical employment skills a dog-turned-human could put on his resume.
Kurogane seemed unconcerned. "There are places down at the dock that will always hire a big guy willing to haul a load," he said, "and even they pay more than what you made. With the two of us both working, we'll save money, and then we can move somewhere better. And then -- " he pulled Fai close to him and wrapped his arms around him, his lips moving so close that they tickled Fai's ear as he spoke. "We can start saving for you to go back to school, like you always wanted."
Fai flushed; he wanted to ask how Kurogane knew that, but he supposed it was really no mystery. He'd told Kurogane-the-dog everything about himself, thinking there were no human ears around, confiding his most secret thoughts and feelings to his silent companion. Not so silent any more, apparently. "But -- but we can't," he protested. "You don't have a birth certificate or anything -- people are going to ask questions. And how could we afford school, anyway? It takes so much money, we'd never be able to --"
His words were lost in a mumble as Kurogane reached up and covered his mouth with his hand, then turned Fai's face towards his. "You spend too much time thinking," Kurogane said huskily, and then his lips covered Fai's.
All rational thought briefly fled as they kissed; with Kurogane 's body pressed against his under the covers, the strange-yet-familiar smell of him and the heat surrounding him, it felt like Kurogane was everywhere, all around him and inside him, warming him up. A moan slipped out of his mouth as Kurogane broke the kiss, and he felt a puff of air as the other man chuckled.
"What's so funny?" he demanded weakly.
"I was just thinking," Kurogane rumbled, kissing briefly at his lower lip. "That now I finally have a way to shut you up whenever I want to."
Fai felt like he ought to object to that, but he couldn't bring himself to. Instead, he sighed, and laid his head on Kurogane 's collarbone, feeling the welcome heat and the rumble of his heartbeat through Kurogane 's chest. He was still weak and felt sick, his world had been turned abruptly upside down, but he couldn't find it in himself to complain. It would take some time to adjust to the changes, but there was one fact that his starved and lonely heart had latched on to: he was no longer alone.
With that comforting thought, he curled himself against Kurogane 's heart and drifted off into sleep, master and man.
~end.
Postscript
Rating: PG
Spoilers: AU.
Summary: On his way home from work one day, Fai encounters a stray dog and decides to feed it. Before long, he finds that he's made a friend -- one determined to stay by his side and protect him whether he likes it or not.
Author's Note: What astonished me about Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle is not so much the fact that this fandom has a story where Fai is - literally - a cat that Kurogane adopts… but that there's more than one. This is sort of my answer to that.
"Hello there, big doggie!" a cheerful voice called down the alleyway.
Kurogane's white-tipped ears flicked up at the sound, and he raised his chin from his paws to look up at whoever had dared to address him so casually. A growl started in his chest, but it was more habit than real anger, a low and almost uncertain rumbling in his ribcage and belly.
A tall, skinny man was standing at the end of the alley, a few steps off the street. His hair was light and flew in wisps around his face, and his laughing eyes were bright blue. Kurogane's ears flattened, and he pushed himself to all four feet even as he adopted a slinking, low-slung posture. He didn't know quite how to react. Most humans ignored him entirely, or looked afraid, unless they were shouting at him or chasing him away. He wasn't used to humans talking to him in friendly tones, at least not since -- Kurogane shuddered inside to think about it -- Master was gone.
"Good doggie," the stranger cooed in a sickeningly sweet voice. "Aren't you a handsome one, so big and black-furred. Oo's a good boy, oo's a good boy?"
Kurogane's growl increased, and he glared venomously at the stranger. He might not have a Master and a Den right now, but that didn't give random strange humans the right to baby-talk him.
At the same time, though, he hesitated to chase the man out of the alleyway, or make any threatening moves. This alleyway wasn't really his territory to begin with; he'd been on the move too long to really make a home for himself. And he was weak with hunger, having trouble scrounging enough to eat from the trash cans in these alleyways. He didn't feel up to a fight, not with the other city dogs, and not with this strange, stupid human. He crouched down a little lower, pressing the side of his body against the wall, and lowered his ears a little more. His entire posture eloquently spoke of, Leave me alone.
Far from taking a hint, though, the light-haired man took a few more steps into the alleyway. He was carrying a package that crinkled and smelled of plastic, and he crouched and leaned forward, his head almost at the level of Kurogane's as he stretched out one hand. "You haven't had enough to eat in a while, have you?" he said softly. "Poor guy. You're all alone. I guess you must have lost your people, if nobody is taking care of you. Or did they throw you out on the street to starve?"
Kurogane sniffed suspiciously in his direction, and relaxed his defensive posture as enticing smells made their way out of his bag. His ears perked up again despite himself, and he sniffed again. His growls shifted to soft whines.
"Here, I have something you can eat," the man announced, sitting back on his heels and reached into his plastic bag. "Lucky for you, I got paid today, so I can afford to spare a little bit of meat…"
He took out something that smelled delicious, wrapped in paper, and Kurogane could not stop himself from drooling as he deposited it on the alleyway floor. When he nosed aside the stiff, waxy paper, he found ground raw meat, cold but dripping with delicious bloody juices. He instantly forgave the man for the baby talk right there on the spot, and charitably decided that as humans went, this one wasn't so bad.
When the meat was all gone he snuffled around trying to find a last few crumbs, tail thumping against the alley floor as he licked the paper for the last of the juice. The man chuckled, his chin propped in his hands as he watched Kurogane fish around in the paper. "Still not enough…?" he asked.
"Try this," he said, digging back into his bag and pulling out a package of sausages, long tubular things with pinched-off ends tied with thread. "Who knows what all is in here, but you dogs can eat most kinds of meat, can't you?"
The sausages were a little harder to handle than the hamburger had been. He had to pick up each sausage by one end, then toss his head up to swallow the whole thing with a gulp. The pale-haired stranger laughed out loud to watch his antics, but Kurogane charitably decided to forgive him the indignity, at least right now.
Once the sausages were all gone, he looked up at the man hopefully, a small whine escaping him. "Sorry, that's all I have for now," he said regretfully. "Unless you can eat cheese as well?" He fished around in his bag for something else, broke off a chunk of some yellow, bitter-smelling substance and offered it. Kurogane sniffed the offering in his hand for a moment and took it, but although he mouthed it a few times, it tasted more like plastic than like food. He looked at the strange man in disgust, and snorted deep in his doggy chest.
The man laughed again. "Ah, well, guess I can't blame you, that's American cheese," he said.
He reached out with an empty hand, and although Kurogane was wary, this time he let the man's fingers brush across the top of his head, rub his ears. He had a nice touch -- gentle, maybe a bit on the wishy-washy side, tickling and irritating more than he satisfied.
Kurogane hated to admit it to himself, but had missed humans' touch.
Abruptly the light, tickling touch became too itchy, and Kurogane sat back abruptly and began to scratch behind his ear with a hind leg. The man laughed again and rose to his feet, to Kurogane's annoyance, brushing his hands off on his pants leg.
"I have to go now, big doggie," he said. "I'd better get home before dark. I hope you can find someone else to give you food, or find your people again."
With one final pat, the man turned towards the mouth of the alley and started off down the street. He didn't see the dark human figure, further back in the intersection, detach itself from the shadows and begin to follow him.
But Kurogane did.
Cautiously -- he was out of his territory, and he had learned to be wary of men who would try to catch him -- he slipped out of his pathetic excuse for a temporary den and sniffed down the street. The laughing man's smell-trail was easy to pick out, leading recent and steady away down the street. The darker, slightly sicker smell-trail of another human was overlaid on top, dirty and chemical, following close behind.
Kurogane snorted, sneezed, then leapt to his feet and began to follow them. There weren't many other humans on this street, and when he caught up to the two that had been following, he froze in place at the sound of human voices shouting.
The sick man had grabbed onto his human, who staggered backwards, crying out as the intruder grabbed his shoulders and shook him like a ragdoll. "Shut up and be quiet!" the dark figure was saying loudly. "Shut up and give me your money! All I want is your money. Do it or else you get hurt!"
"Calm down, okay, just calm down," he heard his human's voice, pleading in a way that darkened Kurogane's vision and made his lips lift in a snarl. "Look, I don't have any money, I spent it all on groceries. You can have them, okay? Just take them --"
"Fuck the goddamn groceries, man!" the dark figure yelled, lashing out with his arm and ripping the plastic bag, sending cans and packages bouncing everywhere. "I know you have cash! I heard you say you got paid today! Now gimme the fucking cash, or else --"
Fury blazed up in Kurogane's mind; a low growl began in his chest, building higher and higher as he crept forward, all his hair standing on end. How dare this filthy thug threaten his human? He would pay for this!
He leapt forward, his powerful leg muscles catapulting him across the distance. His jaws closed around the attacker's arm in an unbreakable grip, and the mugger screamed as sharp teeth ripped into the skin of his arm. He turned around, shaking his arm wildly, beating at his head as he tried to make Kurogane let go.
The light-haired man staggered back, arms full of ripped plastic and a look of shock on his face. He didn't see a wound, but Kurogane couldn't tell if he was injured or not, not through the smell of the attacker's blood filling his mouth and nose. He ignored the heavy blows to his face, bracing his large paws on the rough concrete and throwing all his substantial weight towards dragging the man backwards.
"Call off your dog! Call off your goddamn dog!" the man was crying hysterically, and the blond man just shook his head, hands fumbling in the pockets of his coat for a small silver object.
The mugger's flailing free arm found a discarded length of pipe lying against a wall, and he grabbed at it frantically, then swung it around to impact with a heavy thud on Kurogane's side. It was an awkward angle and didn't do as much damage as it could have, but it was enough to make Kurogane yelp loudly and lose his grip on the man's arm.
With his side smarting, and his mouth full of the nasty taste of the other man's blood, Kurogane scrambled around to place himself between the mugger and the blond human, who had the little metal disk up to his face now. For a moment, he licked his lips and hefted his makeshift weapon, but Kurogane's throat-ripping snarl stopped him in place.
"I'm calling the cops," the blond man said in a firm voice that shook only slightly. "You’d better get out of here, and don't come around this area looking for trip money again."
The mugger had been expecting an easy mark; the savage dog and the threatened cops were too much for him. The piece of pipe clattered to the ground as he turned and fled, stumbling and clutching his mauled arm with his good hand.
Kurogane stayed in a guard position long after the man's footsteps had gone, until the trail of blood he'd left behind began to cool. Then, finally, he sat down at the blond man's feet and bayed loudly in triumph. He'd defended his good person, and made a bad one run off like a wounded rabbit. Oh yeah, he was a bad-ass motherfucker.
"Good doggie," a faint voice came from behind him, and Kurogane's breath whuffed out of him in surprise as light, tentative hand touched his coat. He looked up into the human's eyes, bright blue and wide with shock. "Would… the brave black doggie like to stay with me tonight…?"
Good dog. It had been a long time since Kurogane had heard those words spoken to him, and he liked the sound of it. He flipped his nose up against the human's hand, leaving a smear of blood against his pale skin; but the man only hesitated before he reached over and scratched Kurogane's ears, much more satisfyingly this time.
Maybe, just maybe, Kurogane had found his new Master. He thought he could get to like this one.
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Part 2
Author's Note:
Those of my readers who are familiar with Pet Shop of Horrors will notice that Yuuko has stepped into the role of D, right down to the little dramatic lecture on the animal breeds' history and traits and how human beings have wronged them. I think this fits; D has no female relatives, but if he did, she would be Yuuko.
Those of my readers who are not familiar with Pet Shop of Horrors, what are you doing?! Go out and read it right now!
The next day, Fai dug out an address book and set off for the nearest animal shelter. The big black dog paced beside him, as neatly as though he'd been trained to heel, although Fai had no leash nor anything to use as one. Perhaps he had been trained, Fai thought. He was used to people, so he must have been someone's pet before he was abandoned on the street. Fai smiled, and reached down to ruffle his hand across the dog's silky ears, earning a growl. And you will be someone's pet again, he thought. You're a good dog, anybody would be lucky to have you. It's just too bad that I can't keep you myself.
He was grateful to the dog for protecting him, but his apartment was too small to keep a large animal, and he couldn't afford the responsibilities that came with a pet -- food and toys and medical care. As thanks for helping him, he'd give the dog to the proper authorities to care for him; they'd find a good home for him, someone who could care for and reward him properly.
He told himself that repeatedly as they walked the streets to the shelter, but Fai couldn't help but feel a little sadness in his heart at the thought of saying good-bye.
The shelter was smaller than he'd expected, just another street number in a crowded row of commercial buildings. The storefront was grey and dilapidated, but pasted with signs and notices in bright and cheery colors, and the windows were full of cages. Fai took a breath, looked down at the black dog, and then pushed the door open and went in.
The counter was staffed by a young woman, more of a girl really, with wispy ginger hair and bright green eyes. She looked up from her notebook and saw him, and her face brightened into a happy smile. "Hello!" she said. "What can I do for you today? Are you looking to adopt?"
Fai grinned back; it was hard not to return such a sweet and friendly smile. "Oh, hello," he said. "No -- I'd like to adopt, but I'm afraid I can't keep a pet. I actually came to bring this dog to the shelter. I was hoping you could care for him."
"Oh." The girl's eyes dropped to the black dog by his side, and her smile faded. "This is your dog?" she asked.
"Oh no, he's not mine," he said, smiling, and ruffling the dog's silky hair. "I found him on a street near my house, and he followed me home. He doesn't have a collar or any tags, so I thought he must be a stray. He helped me out big time last night!" he laughed.
"And you want to bring him here?" For some reason, the girl sounded a little unhappy with the prospect.
"Yes," he said, surprised by her demeanor; she had seemed like such a friendly sort. "I can't keep a dog, but I thought the least I could do was get him off the street and to some shelter, so he can be adopted by a family that cares for him. Is something wrong?"
"Well..." the girl said, and bit her lip, her green eyes troubled. "To tell you the truth, I don't think this one has a very good chance of being adopted."
"What? Why not?" Fai said, bewildered. "He's smart and brave -- he'd make a wonderful guard dog for anybody."
"Well, he's an adult," she said reluctantly. "Animals have a hard time finding homes once they're not cute puppies and kittens any more. And he looks like he's part pit bull, which makes it even harder; a lot of people think that pit bulls are dangerous and don't want them near their children. A lot of pit bulls get abandoned when their owners move, and a pit bull who's found loose on the street makes a lot of people upset. Usually somebody calls animal services to come and get rid of them."
Fai was shocked -- he hadn't expected that the shelter wouldn't take him in. The dog turned and nudged hard against Fai's thighs, growling softly, as if sensing his distress. Fai put a hand on his warm fur for steadiness as the girl continued.
"On top of that, this guy is so big, you couldn't keep him in an apartment and it would be hard even in a house with a small yard. Not many people here in the city would have room for an animal this size. To be honest, we don't really have the room here, either. A large dog needs a lot of space, exercise, and food. We just don't have the resources to care for an animal this size indefinitely; we have to think about the needs of the other animals who need help. If he's just a lost dog we could keep him for a little while, while we try to find his owners... but if nobody comes to claim him within a week or so, we'd have to put him down," the girl finished, nearly in tears.
The girl took a deep breath and picked up her pen, her face tightly pinched, and tried to smile. "But maybe we can find his family before that happens," she said, forcing bright cheer. "So, maybe if you could tell us where you picked him up?"
"No!" Fai said quickly. He got down on his knees and put his arms around the dog's neck, feeling the growls reverberate through his ribs. "That won't be necessary. I'll take him home with me. He can be mine."
"Are you sure?" the girl asked anxiously. "I mean -- you seem to know each other pretty well already, but… a lot of houses in the city don't allow pit bulls at all. Is your landlord going to be okay with it?"
"I'm sure he won't mind," Fai assured her, thinking himself lucky for a change that Ashura never gave a damn about anything that went on in his building. If he hadn't bothered to shut down his upstairs neighbors who were running a cockfighting ring out of their apartment, he doubted the man would care much about a new dog, no matter what the breed.
"Well… in that case, great!" The unhappiness on her face cleared, and the girl beamed at him again. "How about this? If you sign him into the shelter and then fill out a form to adopt him right away, then you'll be covered under our triple-A policy - Adult Animal Adoption. That means we'll give him his rabies and other vaccines, and a voucher for pet food that can be redeemed at any store. And you can get any of the equipment that we sell in the store for half-price. Would that help?"
"Oh, yes," Fai said gratefully; to be honest, he didn't know how else he was going to be able to afford vet bills. His head was spinning with the import of his impulsive decision, and worries about how he was going to be able to adapt to this sudden change; but he couldn't have just let his savior be packed off to die.
"I'm so excited for you both!" the girl was babbling, as she dug into her stack of paperwork and handed him a dauntingly long form and a pen. "I'm sure you'll be really close friends. You won't regret this, not for the rest of both of your lives!"
Looking down at the white-tipped ears, and the steady red eyes that returned his gaze, Fai hoped that she would turn out to be right.
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On his way home from the shelter, with the black dog walking beside him, Fai kept an eye out for a pet store where he could use the coupon. The quickest route home cut through Chinatown, and many of the familiar stores Fai knew were nowhere to be found in this region. When at last he saw a sign that was written in English, proclaiming itself Count D's Pet Shop, he turned his steps towards it and slowed to a stop outside the door.
He stared at the shopfront for a little while, taking in the elaborate architecture. This wasn't like any pet store he'd seen before. But all pet stores must sell pet food, wouldn't they? He looked around for a sign that would say whether or not animals were allowed inside, but didn't see any; but he didn't have a leash to tie the dog outside, either.
"Welcome," a rich voice floated out to him from the interior of the shop. "Please, do come in."
"Is it all right to bring my dog inside?" Fai called back, peering a little uncertainly into the dark interior.
The voice gave a little chuckle. "Yes, you may come inside with him," it replied. As if in response to the invitation, the dog pushed his way inside the shop; Fai followed on his heels.
Once inside he rocked to a stop. Unlike the cages of animals or rows of pet products he was expecting, the room inside was furnished like a parlor or living room, beautifully decorated in the Chinese style. There were several rich couches arranged around a low table, where tea and sweets had been set out. Lounging on one of the low couches was a beautiful Asian woman in a cheongsam, with elaborately dressed hair.
"Welcome," the woman said again, her voice almost a sensuous purr.
"I'm sorry," he began automatically, backing a step towards the door. "I thought -- this is a pet store?"
"Yes, we do sell pets here," she replied pleasantly. "Pets of all kinds -- common pets and exotic, to pets that you would not believe exist outside your wildest dreams. We sell not only pets here, but hopes and dreams -- and wishes, if you can meet the price."
"Er," he said, remembering the sign outside. "Are you Count D?"
"My grandfather is overseas on business," she said smoothly. "I am looking after the shop while he's gone. My name is Yuuko. What can I help you with? Surely," her eyes dropped to the dog, who was sitting on his haunches and staring at her, "you have no need of an additional companion, with this brave warrior by your side."
"Oh, no, I don't need another pet," he said hurriedly. "I can't afford -- That is, the girl at the shelter gave me a coupon for dog food. She said that any pet store in the area would be able to honor it. Do you have food for him that I could buy…?"
While the black-haired boy with glasses took the voucher and filled Fai's order, the strange woman Yuuko pushed herself up on the divan and regarded the dog with heavy-lidded interest. He stared fearlessly back at her, his breath making low grunting noises in his chest, but then he yawned, displaying sharp white teeth, in a gesture of disinterest. "A warrior spirit indeed," she said.
"Yes," Fai said, thinking back to the way the dog had protected him the night before. "He's strong, too. The girl at the shelter said that he was part pit bull?"
"Partly," Yuuko agreed. "But the stronger part of his blood comes from his other heritage. He is a Shiba Inu, the Japanese working dogs."
"A shiba inu?" Fai was surprised. "I thought they were much smaller."
"Purebred shiba inus are, but this one gets his size from his pit blood. Even for that, he's remarkably large," Yuuko remarked. "But you can see the shiba heritage in the tail, here, and the markings on the chest and feet, which are known as urajiro. There are three major breeds of shiba inus; the shinshu, which is the most common in the United States today, the mino, and the sanin. This child comes from the sanin bloodline, which is unusual; between the bombings in Japan that killed thousands, and the distemper epidemic that followed, very few of them survived the second world war.
"This child is the last son of a dying clan." Her voice went quieter on the last words, her eyes sad where they rested on the dog. Then she sat up, looked back up to him, and her voice became brisker. "If he were a purebred, he would be priceless to the right collector. Perhaps it's just as well that he is a mix, so that you would not be tempted."
The way she said that made Fai uncomfortable, as though she knew exactly how desperate his money situation was. "I don't feel like he would be mine to sell, anyway," Fai said, feeling slightly defensive. "I just fed him one time and he followed me home of his own free will. I only filled out the adoption forms so that he wouldn't be taken by the pound or put down."
Yuuko smiled, and there was something in that smile that seemed like she knew what he had been thinking. "Shibas are known for their intelligence, protectiveness, and willingness to work hard," she said, "but their most notable trait is their intense loyalty. They are not like other dogs, who will choose a clan or family of people and defend them like a pack. Instead, they bond with one specific person. Like the samurai warriors of old, they choose one person to be their master, and they will protect that person with their life."
The black-haired boy came up to him with his package, then, and Fai took it gratefully, holding the heavy bag of dog food like a shield between them. The dog got up from his seated position, and came quickly to heel at Fai's side. Fai hesitated a moment, looking around the pet store. "Is there anything else I should get for him?" he asked a little reluctantly. "Like a collar, or a leash so I can tie him places…"
"I wouldn't recommend it," Yuuko said in an indifferent voice. "If you command him to stay, he'll stay -- unless he thinks you're in danger. Then there is no lock or leash that could keep him from your side."
"Well, in that case… thank you for everything, I think," Fai said, somewhat bewildered by the strangeness of this whole transaction. He went back out onto the street, carrying his heavy bag and with the dog trotting beside him; it wasn't until he got home and opened the package that he found his dog food voucher from the vet tucked inside, unused.
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Part 3
Author's Note: Please note that a responsible pet owner should always be sure to neuter their pets, and a large and potentially dangerous dog like Kurogane (and we know that he is dangerous!) ought not to be allowed to run around loose. But, we'll forgive Fai here because it's Kurogane.
Fai named the dog Kurogane. He'd heard somewhere that it meant 'black' in Japanese, which seemed appropriate, since the mysterious pet store owner -- Yuuko -- had told him the dog was part shiba. But the name rarely got used in that form; he just as often called the dog "puppy" or "doggie" or "woof-woof," since Kurogane responded the same way to his voice no matter what name he used.
Living with Kurogane was a revelation to Fai; it opened a whole new world up to his eyes. In some ways it was much easier than he'd feared, since Kurogane was an adult dog and not a puppy. He didn't need to be housetrained, he already responded well to commands, and he was mature and restrained enough not to cause havoc in Fai's house or chew up his clothes. He accepted the worn-out beanbag and layers of old coats and blankets that Fai offered him as a bed with deliberate dignity, and settled about the business of disguising the original color with layer on layer of black dog hair.
Kurogane was incredibly smart; he constantly surprised Fai with how much he could do, and how much he was able to understand. He was able to open any cabinet, drawer, or door which was not locked. Within a few days of settling at Fai's home, he recognized all of the items in the apartment by name, and was willing to pick many of them up and carry them over to Fai on request.
He seemed to know the difference between Fai really wanting something and Fai giving him commands just to watch him do it, though, and would pointedly ignore Fai during those times. In fact, Kurogane seemed perfectly capable of ignoring any of Fai's commands that he didn't think were 'right.' He was stubborn and willful, not exactly the picture of eager obedience that Fai had always associated with dogs. Kurogane did what he wanted, when he wanted, which only sometimes happened to coincide with what Fai wanted him to do.
Fai talked to his new dog almost constantly; it was such a relief having another living being nearby that he couldn't help himself. He was sure that Kurogane understood much of what he said, although whether he bothered to listen was another question; Kurogane spent much of his time that he was in the apartment completely ignoring Fai. At times, though, he would growl or let out a low woof in response to something Fai had said, almost as though carrying on a conversation.
Word quickly got around the neighborhood about Fai's new dog, which according to rumor had nearly torn someone's arm off defending him. The amount of respect his neighbors paid to him increased dramatically, and Fai never came back from the restaurant where he worked to find his ground-floor apartment broken into again. Except for when he was at work, Kurogane accompanied Fai everywhere he went outside the apartment. It made a huge difference having the big black dog by his side; Fai no longer felt threatened by any of the lurking figures in alleyways or shadows. He felt much freer to go out during the day, or stay out longer after dark.
With a new and uncharacteristic boldness, he began to explore the area around his home, for the first time getting to know and developing a fondness for the city he lived in. Finding new places, with Kurogane by his side, made the next few months an exciting adventure. He even found a small green park a few blocks away where he could take Kurogane to play. A cheap Frisbee and some tennis balls were all the equipment they needed for endless games of chase and fetch, although they lost Frisbees about as frequently as Kuro's strong jaws clamped down too hard and collapsed the tennis balls. If nothing else was handy, there were always sticks.
Although Kurogane loved to chase and catch, he was not very big on the 'fetch' aspect of things; he plainly thought that if Fai wanted his toy back, he was going to have to come and get it. Fai retaliated by playing keep-away, holding the toy high over his head where Kurogane couldn't reach it. This enticed Kurogane to chase him through the park, much to the alarm of any other park-goers at the sight of the huge black dog growling threateningly, and knocking the slender young man over as his jaws snapped at Fai's hands.
Despite what the shelter girl had said about pit bulls, Fai was never worried that Kurogane might hurt him; he knew Kurogane far too well, and for all his strength and potential ferocity, he had never hurt Fai even by accident. At times, when they were lying together on the grass and both panting from exertion, he would remember what the lady at the pet shop had told him about the loyalty of Shiba Inus; that they picked one master and stayed with them forever. He would close his eyes and bury his face against Kuro's thick black fur, as the dog's warm wet tongue lapped against his hand, and hope it was true.
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Kurogane stood on his hind legs and used his nose to bump aside the latch of the bathroom window from the outside. Gathering his powerful leg muscles under him, he sprang up and over the windowsill, landing on the inside with barely a bump. He was even able to pull the window shut after him with his jaws, not liking the cold damp drafts that came in under the doors if he didn't. No point in having an inside den, after all, if the weather was going to be like outside.
He jumped from the sink to the floor with a thump, and his claws ticked on the tile as he padded out into the main room from the bathroom. He was feeling very pleased with himself right now; he'd gotten into an argument with two ambitious schnauzers and even a stray Doberman who'd all been looking to expand into this block. He'd won, of course; now that he had regular food and a place to sleep -- and a territory worth defending -- no mangy mutt was going to be able to stand up against him.
A quick glance around confirmed what his nose had already assured him; his den was safe and secure, all was as it should be. His new den was spacious and warm, and he was able to come and go as he pleased. His master was home, which was a little unusual at this hour but not displeasing. As far as Kurogane was concerned, his master worked far too hard, and often came back to the den too tired to want to go to the park and play.
Aside from that detail, though, Kurogane couldn't be more pleased with his current set-up. His master was lovely, friendly and attentive and always willing to play, except when he was exhausted from work. Sure, he had a few qualities that Kurogane would knock out of him if he could -- like the fact that he chattered meaninglessly all the time, and that he insisted on hugging Kurogane when he'd made it clear that he didn't like it -- but Kurogane was willing to defend him against all comers. His master belonged to him and nobody else. At least there had been no talk in all his master's chatter about trying to take him to the V-E-T for the painful unmanning operation that so many of the street dogs had been subjected to. If he had, then Kurogane would have had to take steps.
Thinking of his master, he looked around the little apartment; normally he'd be in the kitchen, making delicious smells come out of the various wall boxes, but there was no sign of him. Poking his head around the doors, Kurogane eventually found his master in the bedroom, and why? It was too early to go to sleep.
His master was seated on the bed, and his hands were wrapped around the phone, but he wasn't talking into it. He was just sitting there, holding it in his lap, and his expression was strange, somehow empty and flat. Kurogane's concern increased; normally his master was happy and smiling, or making even stranger faces. It wasn't right for him to look so empty. Something was wrong.
He went over to his master and pushed his head into his lap, huffing softly to get his attention. When that didn't work, he impatiently swatted the man's leg with his paw. His master needed to tell him what was wrong, so that he could go out and rip the throat out of whatever had made him so sad.
Slowly, his master raised his face until he could focus on Kurogane. "Kuro," he said in a dull voice, for once not attaching any of the stupid nicknames to the end of it. "You're back."
His voice was all wrong too, quiet and flat, not happy and bubbly at all. Kurogane jumped up onto the bed beside his master, disdaining the "no puppy on the covers!" rule entirely, and settled down against his master's side, looking intently into his face. His master's fingers slid into his coat, curling against the good scratching-spots, but his face was turned away, staring off to the side.
"I've heard it said that suicide runs in families," he said quietly. "Or that it's contagious, like a disease. If you know someone who's killed themselves… if it's happened to someone in your family… the more you see it, the more you think about it, the more it gets into your head, and the more likely it is that you'll try to kill yourself, too. I don't know if that's really true, but I don't know how else to explain it, unless I really am under a curse.
"I used to have a family -- a father and mother, and a twin brother, Yuui. One day when we came home from school, we found Mother in the bedroom. She'd hanged herself. We didn't know why… even now I still don't know why, but I'll never forget it, opening that door, calling out, and then seeing… one shoe had fallen off, and she was wearing her nice dressy socks, the ones with the flowers on them. Why do I still remember that? I don't remember what her face looked like -- I don't -- but I remember that.
"When we were freshmen in high school, my brother killed himself. We'd been bullied at school ever since we were children, and I guess he just couldn't take it anymore. He locked himself in the bathroom -- we had to call the police to break down the door. The police wouldn't let me near, wouldn't let me see. I still don't know which is better… seeing or not seeing…
"And now my father just blew his brains out." The words sounded like they were dragged out of his throat, and his eyes were sparkling with tears. "We weren't close -- I hadn't seen him since my last year of high school, when he found out I was gay, when he threw me out of the house. We'd never even spoken since then, and now I find out… he was the last of my family, and I found out because his neighbor heard the shot, and came to see if he was okay -- and I --"
"I'm the last one now," he choked out, and the tears began pouring down his face. "I'm alone. I don't have any family, I don't have anyone. She said the… the funeral is on Thursday, and I… oh, Kuro, I don't… I don't even have enough money to buy a plane ticket to go to his funeral…"
He broke down into sobs, burying his face against Kurogane's neck, his hands clutching in the spiky black hair as he cried. The dog endured it patiently, pressed his warm furry body against his master's, and licked the tears away from where they fell onto his hands. It was all he could do; it was enough.
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Part 4
Author's Note: Gosh, for all that this started out as a fluffy AU, I pretty much made Fai's life suck as hard as it possibly could with no curses or magical imprisonment involved. He's got no money, he has a crap job and lives in the bad part of town, his family's all dead and he has no friends. Meeting Kurogane was pretty much the only good thing that ever happened to him.
Soon enough, summer gave way to autumn, and the city became colder. Fai's heating bills began going up, and he was struggling to meet rent payments as it was. He constantly worried about having enough food for Kuro; he was a big dog, and needed to eat almost as much as Fai himself. At least he was no longer a young, growing dog.
Thanks to a tip he'd received from Sakura, the pretty young volunteer at the shelter, for a while he was able to get dog food at a local charity that donated food and other goods to pet owners in financial trouble. It was humiliating to have to rely on a charity, but Kurogane needed to eat, and that was more important than his own pride. Gradually, though, even their stocks of available dog food were dipping low, and every day Fai had to put a little less in Kuro's bowl.
The guilt racked at him; he had adopted Kuro, and thus taken responsibility for him. He felt like he was failing him. He searched his mind for some other way to get more money, or find cheaper food, but couldn't think of anything.
Kurogane often went out in the evenings; he let himself in and out through Fai's back window, the one with the broken lock. Fai had long ago given up trying to stop him; Kurogane could open any latch or seal he tried to put on it. His collar and tags showed that he had all his shots up to date, anyway, so hopefully he wouldn't get picked up by the pound; and he always came home.
He entered Fai's apartment with a rattle and a thump, walked into the room licking his chops, then went into the kitchen to drink noisily from the water bowl. Fai got up to fill his bowl with food; his throat tightened as he poured the last of the bag of dry food into the bowl, barely filling it to half its level. Taking the pathetic offering, he put it on the floor next to the water bowl. "Here, Kuro," he called softly. "Sorry this is all there is tonight. Tomorrow I should get paid, so I can go and buy another bag, but for tonight, just bear with it, okay?"
Kurogane glanced over at the bowl, then snuffed and turned away from it, showing no interest at all. Instead he padded over to the bed, the one that Fai had made from a beanbag and old coats, and stepped into it, turning around twice before flopping down with a loud huffing noise.
Fai was confused. This was Kurogane's usual after-dinner routine; he was behaving as though he'd already eaten, but he hadn't eaten anything. Confusion gave way to concern. He picked up the bowl and carried it over to Kurogane, setting it beside his head. "What's wrong?" he asked, as though Kurogane could somehow answer him. "This is the same as usual, I promise; it hasn't gone bad or anything, even if there isn't as much."
Kurogane turned to sniff at the bowl, then yawned loudly, licking his chops as though he'd just eaten a substantial meal. He turned his back on the bowl of food, and settled back down with a contented sigh. He didn't act in the least bit hungry, although breakfast had been scanty that day too, and he'd been out all day…
Realization began to dawn on Fai. "Kuro-tan," he said. "Are you trying to tell me that you've already eaten? That you're finding food elsewhere?"
Kurogane raised his head to look at him, and whuffed in a tone that was a mixture of exasperation and satisfaction, as though Fai was a dim six-year old who'd just grasped a simple concept. He yawned again, and deliberately put his head down and closed his eyes.
Overwhelming relief filled Fai, and he reached out to put his arms around Kurogane and hug him close. The dog tolerated it, for a change; normally he didn't like to be hugged or restrained for more than a few seconds. "I'm sorry I can't do better, Kuro-tan," Fai said, voice muffled against Kurogane's shoulder. "Just keep coming back, okay? Don't forget this is where you live."
Kurogane pressed his cold nose against the side of Fai's neck for a moment, as if agreeing; then he began to growl and struggle to get away.
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As the autumn deepened into winter, the worsening economy plunged the downtown area where Fai lived into a depression. People started eating out less and less, and the tips from the remaining patrons dwindled almost to nothing, leaving him with a base salary of barely four dollars an hour. To try to make up the difference, Fai began working longer and longer hours; coming in early or staying long after close to sweep and clean the kitchens at the restaurant.
He made a few tries at finding a new job; but all of the other businesses in the area were in the same boat, and he couldn't search too far abroad. Unless he could find a job close to the major public transit centers, he wouldn't be able to commute from home; he couldn't afford a car. He quickly realized he was lucky to have any job at all, without a college degree or even a high school diploma to his name. By the end of December, he estimated that he could just barely make rent for January if he traded with some of the other wait staff to work all the Christmas shifts; for once, not having anyone to share the holidays with worked to his advantage.
His small pile of savings shrank rapidly as the weather grew colder, and Fai soon was forced to decide between buying food or paying for heat. Thanks to the combination of cold temperatures and overwork, he developed a cold and cough. He felt a little guilty about continuing to work in food service with a cough, but he didn't know what else to do; he couldn't take time off work, and he couldn't afford a doctor. He compromised by buying cough suppressants to keep the cough down while he was waiting tables. But those ate into his cash flow as well, and they didn't really cure the cold, just suppressed the symptoms.
On the morning of December 31st he woke up with a pounding headache and a feeling like a thick suffocating blanket wrapped around his throat and chest. He struggled to his feet and the room tilted dangerously around him; vertigo and dizziness sloshed in his inner ear.
I have to get to work, he thought. I can't afford to miss a day. He staggered over to the sofa and sat down hard, head hanging. He lifted his head a few moments later, noting with confusion how the room swam in his vision. He was thirsty. I'll get a drink of water when I get to work, he promised himself. No, I'll get one now, it's a long cold walk to the restaurant. He struggled to his feet and staggered into the bathroom, pouring himself a glass of water and drinking it.
The water tasted strange in his mouth, and moments later he was on his knees on the tiled floor, retching into the basin. He coughed and wiped his mouth, then used the sink to pull himself to his feet. I don't have time for this. I have to get to work!
Groping for his keys, took a step forward, then lost his footing and fell, landing with a bone-jarring crash. As he lay on the floor, half-stunned, his thoughts began to wander. He began to believe that he was already at work, stacking dishes on the cart in preparation for his shift. He went to load coffee into the grinder for the morning crowd, then suddenly remembered that he had to buy dog food for Kurogane on his way home. "Stupid of me to forget," he mumbled to himself, talking to the swizzle sticks that were lined up on the shelf. "I could have just gotten it on the way to work this morning... Wait a minute, I didn't go to work this morning..."
He came to himself on the floor of his apartment, with Kurogane whining and licking at his hands. Lying on the unprotected floor was chilling him fast, but he began to feel cold with fear, as well. Something was very wrong. I have to get up... I have to go to work, I have to buy food for Kuro...
Something hard bumped against his hand; with an effort he managed to focus his eyes on the length of his arm, and saw a slightly tooth-marked bottle of water brushing his fingertips. Kurogane pawed at his elbow, then nudged the bottle against his hand with his broad nose. "Clever Kuro-boo," Fai crooned at him, as he fumbled shakily with the top of the bottle. "How did you know I was thirsty?"
He got the top off, spilling water all over himself and the carpet in the process, and swallowed greedy gulps. Almost immediately, his stomach rebelled; this time he was barely able to make his feet and stagger the few steps to the kitchen sink before he threw it all back up again. This time, the retching didn't stop even when all the water was gone, and the fluid he spat into the sink was bright green. What the hell have I been drinking? I didn't even eat anything funny last night, Fai wondered crazily, as he sank slowly to the floor again.
Enough was enough, he decided. Green fluids were a bad, bad sign. He needed to go to the hospital. After several false starts, he managed to crawl on his hands and knees across the apartment floor, Kurogane at his side practically pushing him along. "Kuro," he croaked out. "…get… phone."
As he approached the bedroom door, Kurogane seemed to realize what he wanted and raced ahead, coming back a few seconds later with the cell phone and dropping it in front of Fai's hands. Fai clutched at the small object, fingers fumbling with the buttons, and it took him several moments to realize that the small grey screen wasn't coming up no matter what buttons he pressed. The phone was dead -- he'd left it off the charger last night, and the aging battery wouldn't hold more than a few hours' charge.
The phone fell out of his hands with a clatter, and Fai collapsed onto the floor, too stunned and exhausted to move. He was shivering with cold, exposed on the cold floor, and he curled into a ball, trying to warm himself up again. Kurogane paced around him, whining anxiously and pawing at his sleeves. He knew that his dog was right, he had to get up, get moving, but his arms and legs just wouldn't respond to him. Kurogane was warm, nice and warm -- he clutched at his dog's fur with clumsy hands, trying to get close enough to curl up around him.
Kurogane's whimpers escalated to full-throated howls, and as Fai drifted off, listening to them, he wondered if anyone would hear them and come to see what was wrong. Somehow, he doubted it. Aside from Kurogane, nobody knew who he was, or cared; Kurogane was all that he had. "…Kuro…." he mumbled deliriously, his teeth chattering. "…help me…"
Somewhere very far away, at the end of a long tunnel, he heard the dog's howling resolve into angry cursing. Strong hands grabbed him; strong arms lifted him. The sudden change of position caused the blood to rush away from Fai's head, and he passed out.
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More author's notes:
Fai's hallucinatory episode is based on one that really happened to a friend of mine; apparently if you get sick enough that you can't keep down water and get reeeeally dehydrated, weird shit starts to happen to you, including hallucinations, and throwing up pure bile (bright green.) Fortunately one of the things my friend did in her confusion was to call her husband at work, who immediately called an ambulance for her, and she's fine now.
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Part 5 (Ending)
Author's Note: We're not going to think too hard about the implications of this.
Fai woke to the sound of his apartment's heater chugging noisily along, although he was sure he'd turned it off and hadn't run it in days. The difference of temperature in his apartment was notable; he could feel the warm air like a caress on his cheek.
But only on his face; the rest of him, he slowly realized, was under warm blankets in his own bed. There were even hot water bottles tucked under his knees and on his stomach, and he didn't even remember owning any of those. His pillows were stacked up behind him, half-propping him up in the warm nest; the position kept the irritating fluid from moving up in his chest and wanting to cough. He felt weak, but lucid again; also hungry and thirsty.
Noise and movement from the living room made Fai stiffen up warily in his covers; someone was in his apartment. Obviously, someone had come in while he was sick and moved him to his bed; someone who was still here now. But who? He vaguely remembered trying to call emergency services, but if an ambulance had come, surely he would be in a hospital right now and not in his own bedroom. His landlord, then, or one of his neighbors? It seemed unlikely, but he couldn't think of any other explanation.
Footsteps approached, and Fai's eyes widened as a figure filled the doorway, then straightened up after having to duck his head under the lintel. He was dressed in a long black trench coat over a dark red shirt and black pants, heavy work boots that scraped over Fai's floor with every step. The man was a total stranger, and he was huge, tall and broad-shouldered and heavy with muscle; Fai shrank back against the pillow as he approached the bed.
As the man stepped into the light of the bedside lamp, Fai was sure he'd never seen him before -- there was no way he could have forgotten that face. His hair was jet black and gleamed in the lamplight, and his features were strikingly handsome, eastern and angular. His sharp eyes, pinning Fai back against the bed, were an unusual reddish color -- but as strange as they were, Fai could almost swear that he'd seen something like them before.
"Who are you?" he demanded shakily. "How did you get in here? Where's -- where's Kurogane ?" He glanced around in a sudden panic, looking for the dark shadow of his guard dog. Kurogane would never have let a dangerous-looking stranger just walk in off the street like this; Kurogane would protect him while he was sick, he was sure.
The big man made a hmph noise, and stepped to Fai's bedside; he realized for the first time that the man was carrying a tray with a steaming mug of liquid, as he nudged aside things on the table to make room. Hands free, he turned again and pinned Fai with his gaze; not hostile, but incredibly intense. When he spoke, his voice was a deep bass rumble, almost a growl. "I've been here the whole time," he said. "I'm Kurogane , of course."
"What?" Fai demanded incredulously, then shook his head. "That's ridiculous! Kurogane is a dog."
"I know," the stranger said with a quiet rumble. "You named me. I am Kurogane ."
Oh, God. He didn't just have any hobo off the street invading his home and molesting him while he was sick; this guy was a genuine loony -- either hopped up on drugs or discharged from some mental ward, if not both at once. "Oh, that's nice," he chirped brightly, pasting a bright smile on his face as his shaking hands fumbled across the bedside table in pursuit of his cell phone; he had to call for help, now. The shaking spread up his arms as he struggled against the heavy covers until his whole body was trembling, reminding him that he was still sick, and very weak.
A large hand descended on the cell phone an inch ahead of his own hand, blocking his grab for it. The big man cut a glance down at the phone, then grunted and took his hand off it, transferring his grip to Fai's hand instead, lifting his arm off the bedcovers. "I know it's hard for you to believe, but it's true. I remember the day that we met, in April of this year in the alley not far from here. You gave me hamburgers and sausages, and then tried to feed me some fake shit that was half plastic. I remember every day that we've spent together since then. Want to ask me about any of them? I can answer anything you throw at me."
Fai's breath caught. Could it be? The only alternative was that he had a truly creepy stalker who'd been watching him obsessively every day since April, or… "No -- I -- I'm sorry, but this just can't be possible…"
The man gave a little grunt of annoyance, like the huffs of exasperation that Kurogane the dog had so often let out. He shifted position, crouching down to kneel beside the bed. "You don't believe me," the man -- Kurogane ? -- said, more of a statement than a question. His red eyes slid shut, and he brought Fai's captured hand up to his mouth; and then a warm, wet tongue slid over Fai's hands, wet heat enveloping each of his fingers and then trailing up the inside of Fai's wrist.
Fai's eyes widened, the hair standing up on the back of his neck; what his mind didn't want to believe, the memories of his nerves and skin insisted must be true. It felt familiar, too familiar, the way the warm longue lapped against his palm. This was his one and only Kuro-tan.
Kurogane 's eyes opened again, meeting Fai's gaze. "Now would be a good time for you to start believing in magic," the big man said.
"How?" Fai whispered. "Why?"
"The why should be obvious, even to an idiot like you," Kurogane said as he lifted his head; and Fai felt a bemused shock at the insult. Weren't dogs supposed to be respectful to their masters? "You don't take care of yourself, you let yourself get so sick you couldn't walk straight. What is it with humans? You're around food all day but you won't eat any of it, you figure out how to heat your homes all through winter but you turn it off and freeze instead. No one but a human could possibly get his head so turned around that he let himself go like this.
"As for the how…" Kurogane trailed off, his eyebrows pinched in uncertainty, as if unsure what to say -- or how much. "You remember Yuuko, don't you? At the Count's pet shop. Her motto is that she sells dreams, and makes wishes come true. Well, that's not just limited to human dreams and wishes, you know. I couldn't take care of you as a dog any more. So I wished to become a man."
Fai nodded slowly. He remembered the disconcerting Yuuko, and the strange pet shop that he'd visited on the day after he met Kurogane. Despite all his better judgment he was beginning to believe, but his stunned brain could not wrap around the consequences.
Kurogane took advantage of his weakness and shoved the tray towards him, picking up the mug and thrusting it in his face. "Drink," he said. "You need fluid."
"I'll just throw it back up --" Fai protested weakly, but Kurogane shook his head.
"You won't. Not this," he said. "I got this tea from Yuuko, it has sugar and nutrients that your body needs right now. You need the warmth, too. Even with every damn blanket in this place on you, your body can't conserve the heat it's not producing."
Too confused to argue, Fai took the tea in one shaking hand and drank it; the taste was odd, but it did seem to settle in his stomach and didn't immediately threaten to come back up. "You seem to know a lot about medicine, for a dog," he said softly.
Kurogane snorted in disgust, an affectation at once so familiar and so strange that Fai's heart clenched. Would he never see his familiar Kuro-tan again? He didn't know what to think, or feel. "There would be no point to having a dog's mind in a man's body, would there," he grumbled. "I wished to be human, so now I am, inside and out. There are a lot of things I understand a lot better now. And there's one thing that I know hasn't changed."
"And what's that?" Fai said, his voice tired and hopeless, chest aching.
Swift hands plucked the half-empty mug out of his grasp and replaced it on the nightstand; in a moment Kurogane was up on the bed, his hands braced on either side of Fai's hips on the covers. That piercing, compelling gaze was back on him, and Fai felt a vertigo, like he was falling forward into Kurogane 's eyes.
"I know that I love you, you idiot," Kurogane said, his voice rich with a deep, unshakeable conviction. "And I know that as long as you want me by your side, I'll be here, until we both die. You're mine to protect, mine to take care of, and mine to love."
A sudden rush of heat that had nothing to do with hot water bottles or tea filled Fai's body, and his face flooded scarlet. There could be no question that Kurogane 's human body was attractive, incredibly so, and Fai had been alone for a very long time. But there was more to it than that.
Ever since Fai had come to the realization that he was gay, he had always felt a hidden sense of shame, of guilt for being something that he was not supposed to be. His tentative experiments with other boys in high school had been secret, guilty things, both of them aware of how forbidden it was to act on these desires. His father's rejection and estrangement had only cemented the idea that he was unnatural and twisted.
Even after he'd moved to the city, he hadn't been able to shake the persistent feelings of guilt; and the few men he'd formed associations with in the gay community had similar pasts, similar neuroses and insecurities. Even his straight friends and coworkers who accepted him did so with a hint of pity and mindfulness, as though his love for men was a deviance that could just barely be tolerated.
But Kurogane -- Kurogane said he loved him, and he did so with such passionate conviction that there could be no question how far he meant that love to go. In his voice and his eyes, the heat and presence of his body, there was not the slightest hint of regret or shame for what he'd said, or for what he felt. He believed, truly believed without a hint of reservation, that loving Fai was the right thing to do, and he expected to be loved in returned without the slightest shame or misgivings. That utter confidence and certainty was something that Fai had never experienced, and it was more stimulating than anything he'd ever felt before.
Kurogane leaned in to nuzzle his cheek, then dragged his tongue up the side of Fai's jawbone, leaving a cool trail behind. Fai shivered, feeling another flush of heat, but then tried to draw away. "You shouldn't -- you're human now, and I'm contagious, you'll probably get sick --" Fai objected.
"Like I care about that," Kurogane snorted disparagingly. "As I said, I'm going to take care of you."
"What are you going to do?" Fai said softly. After the unbelievable events of the day, he was half afraid to close his eyes, for fear that it would all turn out to be a dream. Or else Kurogane 's transformation would turn out to be only temporary, and he would revert to a dog at midnight, or at dawn. He'd only just met the man that his beloved Kuro-tan had become, and hardly knew him, but he was already sure he didn't want to lose him.
Kurogane took his question literally, though. "You rest," he said, "and I take care of you. You'll stay in bed for as long as it takes until you're completely healed."
"No, I can't, my job --" Fai said, but Kurogane cut him off.
"You're not going back to that job," he growled angrily, eyes narrowing just like Kuro-tan's used to. "They work you to death and don't even pay you minimum wage -- they don't deserve you. When you are better, we'll find you a new job, one that pays you decent money and doesn't treat you like shit. In the meantime, I'll work."
"Doing what?" Fai asked disbelievingly. He wasn't sure what practical employment skills a dog-turned-human could put on his resume.
Kurogane seemed unconcerned. "There are places down at the dock that will always hire a big guy willing to haul a load," he said, "and even they pay more than what you made. With the two of us both working, we'll save money, and then we can move somewhere better. And then -- " he pulled Fai close to him and wrapped his arms around him, his lips moving so close that they tickled Fai's ear as he spoke. "We can start saving for you to go back to school, like you always wanted."
Fai flushed; he wanted to ask how Kurogane knew that, but he supposed it was really no mystery. He'd told Kurogane-the-dog everything about himself, thinking there were no human ears around, confiding his most secret thoughts and feelings to his silent companion. Not so silent any more, apparently. "But -- but we can't," he protested. "You don't have a birth certificate or anything -- people are going to ask questions. And how could we afford school, anyway? It takes so much money, we'd never be able to --"
His words were lost in a mumble as Kurogane reached up and covered his mouth with his hand, then turned Fai's face towards his. "You spend too much time thinking," Kurogane said huskily, and then his lips covered Fai's.
All rational thought briefly fled as they kissed; with Kurogane 's body pressed against his under the covers, the strange-yet-familiar smell of him and the heat surrounding him, it felt like Kurogane was everywhere, all around him and inside him, warming him up. A moan slipped out of his mouth as Kurogane broke the kiss, and he felt a puff of air as the other man chuckled.
"What's so funny?" he demanded weakly.
"I was just thinking," Kurogane rumbled, kissing briefly at his lower lip. "That now I finally have a way to shut you up whenever I want to."
Fai felt like he ought to object to that, but he couldn't bring himself to. Instead, he sighed, and laid his head on Kurogane 's collarbone, feeling the welcome heat and the rumble of his heartbeat through Kurogane 's chest. He was still weak and felt sick, his world had been turned abruptly upside down, but he couldn't find it in himself to complain. It would take some time to adjust to the changes, but there was one fact that his starved and lonely heart had latched on to: he was no longer alone.
With that comforting thought, he curled himself against Kurogane 's heart and drifted off into sleep, master and man.
~end.
Postscript