[TRC] The Heralds of the White God (NC17, AU, Kuro/Fai Syao/Saku) 10/20

[mikkeneko]

Title: The Heralds of the White God chapter 10 - Trust My Words
Rating: M
Warnings: An excess of philosophy in the last scene, but not much else.
Summary: In which Kurogane undertakes an unexpected and entirely unwanted journey, and Fei Wong Reed reveals the method to his madness.

Author's Notes: Kozelorug is an entirely made-up word, formed by taking the Belarusian word for "goat" and a Russian compound meaning "unicorn." I didn't really want to call them kirin, which they're not, nor talbuk, even if they totally are.

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---

Kurogane got free from the doctor much later than he'd intended, feeling intense irritation over the whole affair. This Kakei was worse even than the doctors Tomoyo foisted on him in Edo; at least they had been willing to take no for an answer, unlike this man who seemed to want to tell him what he was feeling. After an intense examination, Kakei had declared him with no more serious wounds than bad bruising all up and down his torso and a few pulled muscles in his arms. Which quite frankly, Kurogane already knew; he'd patrolled with worse.

The doctor had finally given him some painkillers, which he intended to get rid of at the first opportunity, and instructions to rest for a few weeks, which he intended to ignore. Nihon would need him in the next few days, to try to be a voice of sanity in their chaotic northern neighbor. He'd need to be clear-headed for that. And Fai would need him, too, if only to stop him from working himself to death with all the new demands that had been placed on his head.

He met up with his overworked lover in the side chamber where they'd tended Ashura, now cleared and swept clean and empty of all but themselves. It was the same tapestried, sun-filled chamber where he and Fai had waited for their audience with Ashura, before everything had gone to hell. The benches had been shoved back against the wall to clear space on the polished floor, and Kurogane left them, instead grabbing Fai's arm and dragged him tumbling into the padded window seat.

Before Fai could protest - not that he seemed to want to protest all that serious - he cut him off with a kiss, pulling Fai tight in his arms as his fingers dug into Fai's shoulders. Fai moaned softly against his mouth, then melted into his embrace, wrapping his arms about him in return and clutching at his shoulders. Kurogane kissed him with a sort of furious satisfaction, pleasure and protectiveness and possessiveness all wrapped into one. Mine. The rest of the world, of Ceres, could damn well wait their turn; he was not going to let them tear Fai to pieces to please them.

Kurogane kept up the kiss until he felt some of the tension in his own stomach unknot and drain away, until he felt the hint of a warm tingle begin to course through his body in response to Fai's nearness. Then, reluctantly, he broke contact and pushed slightly away; now was not a time for thoughts of sex.

"The doctor cleared you?" Fai said in a subdued voice. He leaned his head against Kurogane's shoulder, and brushed feather-light fingers over the purpling bruise visible below his sleeve.

Kurogane grunted a noncommittal response, and Fai laughed breathlessly. "Why am I not surprised," he said.

"I'll be fine," Kurogane snorted. "I've gone into battle with much worse, you know."

"Yes, I do know," Fai scolded him. "That's exactly why I worry."

"This council," Kurogane said, getting down to business before Fai could nag him about his health. "The one establishing a regent while Ashura is out of it. Is that really going to be all right?"

"It should be," Fai said, his expression sobering. "Galladon is right that there has to be some process, or the remaining nobles will scream bloody murder. But now... now they don't really have enough presence to push their own candidate through - not Tennou, anyway. The ministers would far rather have me than him. I'll probably be confirmed as a matter of course, but we have to go through all the right motions first."

He still couldn't see Fai as king of anything, but it wouldn't help matters to say so now. "You won't be alone, anyway," he said instead, doing his awkward best to offer support. "You have all those other wizards to back you up. And you've got me." No one would get through him to harm Fai, not even over his dead body.

"Yes, well," Fai said, and he did not answer right away. He pulled out of Kurogane's embrace, leaving him feeling cold and disappointed, and paced nervously around the room. "That was part of what I wanted to talk with you about."

"What was?"

Fai turned to face him, and his expression was serious. "I don't want you to stay here," he said. "Syaoran is leaving Ruval tonight, leaving Ceres to search for Sakura. I want you to go with him."

"What?" Kurogane stared incredulously. "Are you out of your mind? Dammit, you can't ask me to leave you again! I've been in Ruval for less than a week! Why me? Why not you? Why not anyone else?"

"Do you think I like this either?" Fai snapped in return. "But this is the way it has to be! This - all of this mess and politicking - is nothing but a distraction," he said, waving his hand around as if to encompass the entire castle. "This is his doing - our enemy, the great warlock, the one who murdered your mother. Murder from a distance, chaos and distraction at the critical moment - this is everything he's done before! He wanted to sow chaos, to set us against one another so we'd be too busy and distracted with infighting to seek him out. But finding him - finding Sakura - that's what really matters. We must find her, and stop him before it's too late! If you don't leave by tonight -"

"And what will you do without me, huh?" Kurogane demanded. "You know you need me here! I'm not just going to go trotting off merrily into the wilderness and leave you alone to starve here!"

"Kuro-sama…" Fai heaved a weary sigh, and for a moment all the anxiety and fears that he'd been trying so hard to suppress played over his face. He pushed back his hair, and his hands were shaking. "I still don't think you understand... how important this is. Finding Sakura before it's too late. I'll be all right for a few weeks. You know I will."

"And if it takes more than a few weeks?" Kurogane challenged him with a snarl.

Fai met his eyes solemnly. "Then it probably won't matter," he said. "Nothing will ever matter again."

Kurogane set his teeth. A long, uncomfortable moment of silence stretched between them. "This is pretty hard for me to swallow, you know," Kurogane said at last. "All this end-of-the-world stuff. I fought demons all my life, and I still don't see what could possibly be so terrible that the whole world won't be able to pick up and carry on afterwards."

Fai vented an unsettled half-laugh. "That's because you don't understand how dangerous conjuration really is, Kuro-chan," he said. "With enough power - and he has the power to do it - you could tear the fabric of this world apart. Just the seismic implications of such a shift - he could sink half this continent into the sea. Or blow enough volcanic ash into the sky to blot out the sun for a hundred years."

Kurogane stared at him. He literally could not wrap his mind around the scale of destruction that Fai was describing. "You must be joking," he said.

"I'm not. Listen, Kuro-chan, these are just things that can happen by accident when playing around conjuration. And if he actually has managed to bridge the chasm to other worlds - he could invite any of the denizens from theirworlds to come and enter ours."

"I know demons," Kurogane argued stubbornly. "I'm not afraid of them."

"Those demons were chimera, wizard-forged, but ultimately creatures of this world. I'm talking about creatures or beings that don't even exist on our scale, that don't work by our rules. The creatures he brought in here earlier to spread the curse - those were only tiny, lesser manifestations. If he can open up a large enough portal, he could call into this world a full-sized demon, or even a god. No warrior, however brave - and no wizard, however foolhardy - would be more than flies against them."

Kurogane sat back, shaken despite himself by the dark images that Fai was conjuring. "I don't understand," he said. "If he's been able to do all this for all these years, why hasn't he? What's he been waiting for? And what does he need the princess for, anyway?"

"I don't know." At Kurogane's huff of exasperation, Fai made a frustrated gesture with his hands. "I really don't! I told you before, none of us have any idea what Sakura's magical talent is! But I know it's strong - stronger than anyone else born on Ceres soil. And whatever it is, our enemy has spent years searching for her, and gone to great lengths to kidnap her. He knows what her power is, and he was willing to do anything to get her. We can't afford to let him make use of her power."

Kurogane shook his head stubbornly. "I can't believe that the Princess would lend herself to any such evil scheme," he said.

"Not willingly," Fai said with a ragged catch in his voice, "no. But - but he's very strong, and ruthless. This is the same man who taught the Master of Demons, remember, the same man who murdered your mother in his shrine. He - I don't think there's anything he wouldn't do, to force her if - if she doesn't agree. And she's so - young -"

His voice broke, and he put his hand hastily up to his face, shoulders hitching as he fought to regain control. Kurogane looked down, giving him time to compose himself, feeling ashamed. Damn it - he should have known better. Princess Sakura had a strong will, but she was just a girl, and very sheltered from the world and all its cruelties. Fai was right. He wouldn't be able to rest at night knowing she was out there in the hands of a man like that and not doing anything to save her.

"All right," he said gruffly. "Don't you worry. I'll go. I'll find her and I won't let anyone stop me from bringing her safely home."

Fai inhaled sharply, and when he lowered his hands a moment later, there was a only a suspicious redness of his eyes, the swift-fading sheen of wetness on his cheeks. "Thank you, Kuro-sama," he said quietly. "I believe in you. If anyone can save her, I know you can."

"But I don't understand why you can't go, as well," Kurogane added impatiently. "I know you're being eaten up with worry inside about her. If she's what really matters, then why don't we go search for her together?"

"Because I have to stay here!" Fai's eye flashed at him with angry frustration. "Didn't you hear this nonsense out there? Tennou is the last high-ranking noble left in Ceres, which makes him next in the bloodline for the throne. And he's seeing Nipponese plots and shadows everywhere! I'm the only one who has the legitimacy to block him. If I don't stay here to keep things under control, then the first thing he'll do on seizing the throne is to declare war on Nihon. That's the last thing we need - the borders running red with blood as we fight among ourselves, while our enemy looks down at us and laughs!"

"I don't -" Kurogane stopped midsentence with a frown, then shook his head, trying to order his thoughts. "I know you're right," he said more quietly. "But we still don't even have a clue where to look for them. What makes you think that I'd have any better luck following Syaoran on a wild goose chase?"

Fai stepped away, crossing his arms over his chest as he stared at the door, as though his eye could penetrate through the walls and layers of the castle to hold Syaoran in his gaze. "He loves her, you know," he said quietly. "That sort of love is a powerful magic in its own right. It can form an immensely strong bond, one that bridges great distances and obstacles. And he has a powerful determination in his own will, as well. If he thinks he knows where to find them, then that love will guide him to her."

This all sounded awfully wishy-washy to Kurogane, but he wasn't the wizard and Fai was. Still, although Fai sounded sincere and confident, there was a subtle evasiveness about his words that led Kurogane to wonder if he wasn't being told the whole story.

"But I don't think he can make it on his own, powerful determination or no," Fai said, turning his earnest gaze on Kurogane. "He's not much older than Sakura, and it's a long journey with a terrible enemy at the end. He needs a strong protector who can guide and guard him, and help him face our enemy at the end of the journey. You know he won't consent to travel with any of us wizards - he hates us all. You're the only one that can do it. Your Tsukuyomi, she can see the future too, can't she? Didn't she tell you that you would be going on a journey that she could not see the end of?"

About to respond with angry denial, Kurogane stopped as though poleaxed as Fai's question registered. He remembered that last meeting with Tomoyo, the quiet of the cha-no-yuu, and the mysterious sadness of her voice as she'd whispered to him. A path is opening before you, she'd said,  a path that leads away from here and does not return. I sense great danger if you go down this road; but if you do not, the danger becomes not only for you, but for the entire world.

At the time he'd thought she'd meant his journey to Ceres, but that made little sense; there'd been no danger to him here. Going out into the wilderness against an unknown enemy, however, with only the passionate delusions of a teenage boy as a guide... Had she foreseen this? What had she seen?

"You see," Fai said softly, touching the back of his hand. "I wish that Yukito's visions could tell us more. I wish that we had some form of guidance, some better option, but we have none; and we have no time. You know I wouldn't send you away from me lightly, but this is the best way, the only way. Please. I know what I'm doing."

Fai's quiet pleas moved Kurogane more than his earlier reasoned logic. With a sigh, he resigned himself to the inevitability of this journey. "All right," he admitted grudgingly. "I'll go."

"By tonight?" Fai persisted.

"Yeah. By tonight," Kurogane admitted. He turned a stern eye on Fai. "But before I go, you're going to feed."

A pause, as Fai shifted away from Kurogane, and his gaze slid away. "I don't think that would be wise," Fai said softly.

"What?" Kurogane said. His half-soothed anger burst into new life, and he saw red. "What the fuck, why not?"

"You're leaving on what might be a hard journey," Fai said in a distant, thoughtful voice. Even to Kurogane, it sounded like he was testing out the excuse even as he said it. "You can't afford to lose any blood that might weaken you."

"Bullshit!" For a moment, Kurogane felt the overpowering urge to punch Fai in the head; it took a great effort of will to slam his fist back against the wall behind him, instead. "There's no fucking way I'll accept a half-assed excuse like that! What's wrong with you? What the hell kind of thoughts are going through your head? If I had some way of seeing what you were thinking right now -"

He stopped mid-rant; something about Fai's expression clued him in. "That's it, isn't it?" he said incredulously. "It's the blood bond. You're afraid of it - you're afraid of me knowing what you're thinking!"

"That's not true, Kuro-sama," Fai whispered, completely unconvincingly.

"What aren't you telling me?" Kurogane demanded. "What the hell are you hiding? You ask me to trust you - you want me to go out on a limb on your say-so - and you're keeping back something so big, you won't even let me feed you for fear that I'll find it out! How am I supposed to trust youin a situation like this?"

"Please, Kuro-sama," Fai said. With an urgent step forward he was in Kurogane's personal space, hands reaching up to tangle in the hem of Kurogane's inner coat. Kurogane would have been outraged at the liberty, at Fai trying so blatantly to coerce him, if not for the trembling of Fai's hands. Fai kept his gaze down, to the side, unwilling to meet Kurogane's eyes. "I swear to you it's nothing that would put you in danger, or the boy either. I'm not lying about how important this is. But there are some things that you cannotknow right now, or it will ruin everything. Please, please - if you love me - just trust me, this one time."

Well, hell. How was he supposed to deny an appeal like that?

Kurogane's jaw clenched, and he tilted his head back to glare murderous holes in the ceiling. With great effort, he let out a long breath, bidding his anger to go with it. "All right," he said at last. "All right. But you're going to tell me everything later, you got me?" he growled.

"Yes," Fai's grateful smile lit up his world. "I will, I will. I promise."

---

Syaoran would have walked out into a Ceres blizzard stark naked if he had to, alone and emptyhanded, in search of his princess. But despite that, he was more grateful than he could say when his teacher returned to their quarters and told Syaoran that he was going along to help. Kurogane was obviously in such a foul mood that Syaoran hardly dared ask him why he'd changed his mind. The only thing the big man would say was that Princess Sakura had been the first person to befriend him when he'd been a prisoner here last fall, and Syaoran left it at that.

Even Syaoran couldn't begrudge the generosity of supplies that the Ruval palace staff loaded onto them - riding gear, tents and blankets, ammunition and rations. The kitchen staff, in particular, seemed especially distraught over the kidnapping of the princess - and unlike anyone else in the castle, they seemed to wish him all goodwill in his journey to find them. The cooks burdened them with so much food - some fresh, some dried, and an armload full of camping-gear to cook whatever they hunted - that Syaoran didn't think they would be able to walk under the load.

At least until the stable-master brought out their mounts.

"What the hell is that?" Kurogane demanded, eyeing the beasts with suspicion. Apart from being four-legged and long-faced, they didn't much resemble horses. They were each eight feet tall, for one, with another twelve inches of height added on by the pair of graceful, curved horns sprouting from each head. They were mostly white, although bands of black and even a dark purplish blue decorated their coats, and teir shaggy, wooly-seeming hair covered their entire bodies, not just mane and tail. Their hooves were split, and their step was more like a deer's than a horse's.

An acolyte - white-robed, but without the badges of rank that would mark him as a full-fledged wizard - followed the stablehands out and watched the creatures anxiously. "These are kozelorug,Master Kurogane," he said with some nervousness.

"Never heard of 'em," Kurogane said. "They have these in Ceres?"

"Not exactly," the boy said with a quick smile. "These are... special animals that General Ko has try to make for many years. They are strong like horse, but they jump like deer... they climb rocks like goat. Better for mountain trails, better for rough ground. You need these if you try to climb many mountains."

"That would be really useful," Syaoran said, marveling despite his reservations at the graceful, beautiful animals. "Why aren't they using them all over Ceres? Or were we just not allowed to see?"

The boy shook his head, and seemed to be searching for the words to explain, or at least to explain without giving away many secrets. "They are... the General try to make for many years," he said. "These two, the only strong adults. Others young or sick. Other than these, only six."

"Then they must be incredibly valuable!" Syaoran said incredulously. "And they're just going to let us take off with their only healthy breeding pair?"

The acolyte looked at him with a solemn expression. "General Ko wants you to find Princess Sakura too," he said with perfect clarity.

Ignoring the discussion, Kurogane picked up their bags of gear with a grunt and began loading them onto their uncanny mounts. Syaoran hurried to do the same, feeling somewhat humbled by the incredible gift. The beasts came with their own saddles, which was a good thing, since none of their gear would have fit those slender, sloping backs; the kozelorug saddles also seemed to be built quite differently, with straps to hold a rider in. Nervously, Syaoran wondered just how far they could actually jump.

Before long, they were loaded up, saddled, and ready to go. Syaoran had mounted his beast and was struggling with the straps - it looked a long way to the marble paving stones below - but Kurogane had yet to mount his when quick running footsteps came from the hallway. Kurogane's head turned like a tracking beast, and his eyes narrowed just before the wizard Fai Flowright burst out of the small side door.

"Oh, good, I caught you," the wizard said breathlessly, bending forward and resting his hands on his bent knees as he caught his breath. He was dressed in a full, heavy-looking formal version of the wizards' regalia, every inch of the sweeping robe patterned with blue and silver embroidery, and with several heavy medallions hanging silver jewelry around his neck. The formality of the dress was at odds with his flushed face and disarrayed hair, coming in wisps out of the silver clasp.

"What's all this getup, then?" Kurogane demanded to know in a gruff, unfriendly voice. "Aren't you supposed to be upstairs in the council chamber right about now?"

"Now, Kuro-pon, I couldn't let you go without saying goodbye," Fai said in a teasing voice. He straightened up, turning to look over their preparations; Syaoran stiffened as their eyes met, but Fai's gaze slid past without comment, as though he didn't see Syaoran there at all. He turned back to the warrior. "And I wanted to give you something that will come in handy."

"The last thing we need on this trail is more weight," Kurogane complained. "These stick-legged goat-things are going to founder ten ridown the road at this rate."

Fai chuckled. "Don't underestimate the kozelorug, Kurogane. They may look skinny, but they're stronger than you think!"

Kurogane eyed the equally skinny man in front of him, and vented only a dubious 'hm.'

"It looks like they've supplied you with everything you need," Fai said. The smile faded from his face, making him look fierce and serious. "But this is just from me to you. Hold out your hand."

Kurogane did, with a wary scowl. The wizard took hold of his gloved hand, and his expression stilled, became one of inner concentration. His free fingers moved in an elegant dance in the air a few inches above, and a bright golden light followed them, forming a fluid cloud for a moment before dripping down onto Kurogane's hand like honey. Fai held onto his hand for a moment, eye closed, then opened it and nodded in satisfaction.

"Put your hand on your sword, Kuro-sama," he instructed, no teasing in his voice. Kurogane gave him an incredulous look, but obeyed.

As his hand wrapped around the leather-bound hilt of his greatsword, the light flashed and vanished, and Kurogane jumped, his limbs visibly twitching. He rounded on the wizard. "What the hell did you just do?" he demanded.

Fai grinned, letting out a breath in relief. "It's just a little summoning spell," he said. "In case you get stuck under another landslide and lose your swords... again. You can call them to you from anywhere with just a thought, and you'll never have to worry about being unarmed again."

"Huh." Kurogane opened his hand in front of him, staring at the now-empty palm, and then flexed it closed. He looked back at the wizard. "Thank you," he said seriously.

"It was no problem, Kuro-pon!" Fai said, clapping delightedly.

"Sensei," Syaoran called, jittering with impatience. "Let's go! We're losing the light."

Kurogane nodded to Syaoran, then turned back to Fai. "He's right," he said. "Was that all you had to give me?"

"One more thing," Fai said, and he reached both hands up to Kurogane's shoulders, pulling him down.

Expecting to see more spellcasting being performed, Syaoran blinked, then did a double-take as Fai closed his eye and pressed his lips against Kurogane's. That cheeky -! But instead of objecting, Kurogane was kissing him back, wrapping his arms around the rich-clad robe and pulling him close.

Syaoran gazed at them both in open-mouthed shock for a moment, then jerked his head around to face the other way, his cheeks flaming. He rubbed his palms fiercely against his eyes for a moment, sure they were deceiving him; but when he snuck a peek back at them, they were still locked in an embrace. Since whenhad his master been...?

Head swimming, Syaoran decided not to risk another look back; instead, he picked up the reins of his strange horse-goat mount and urged it into motion, clopping over the flagstones out the gates. That did serve to distract him for a short while; the kozelorug had a gait not quite like that of a real horse, and the unfamiliar saddle hampered his attempts to find his seat. At least he couldn't fall off.

Inside, though, his mind raced with questions. His teacher and that wizard - were lovers? How? He couldn't possibly comprehend it, and yet in that new perspective, a lot of Kurogane's strange behavior over the past weeks made a lot more sense. But - did that mean that his friends in Edo had been right about the swordmaster, that he was a pervert and a traitor to Ceres? And most mind-boggling of all, when had this happened?

After a while - though probably not as long as it seemed - Kurogane emerged from the gate behind him, mounted on his own beast. The kozelorug's formidable height added to his own, and combined with his stormy expression made him rather terrifying to look on.

He caught Syaoran staring, face still hot and eyes still slightly bugged out. "What?" he snarled at the boy.

"Um - nothing," Syaoran said, deciding not to plague his teacher with the questions he was dying to ask. It beat really dying, and he recognized all the signs of his teacher in a really foul mood.

It didn't really matter, Syaoran decided, gathering his own reins again. Kurogane was still his teacher and master, and the best fighter and wisest man alive that Syaoran knew. And he was going to help him rescue Princess Sakura, and there was no one Syaoran would more gladly have at his side.

"All right," Kurogane growled, kneeing his own mount onto the cobbled street ahead of Syaoran's. "Let's get this over with."

They clopped down the steep switchback paths towards the palace city of Ruval - the strange, agile beasts seemed completely unbothered by the steep drop of the grade, and gradually Syaoran grew more confident in his seat. People turned to stare, pointing and whispering as they passed, but nobody bothered them and they did not stop.

At last they passed the last of the stone houses and came to the edge of the city; the road met a crossroads here, with the larger stone-paved roads leading to and away from the palace itself, and a fainter track crossing it.

"All right, kid," Kurogane said. "This is your show. You're the one with the ideas; I'm just along for the ride. Now, where are we really going?"

Syaoran glanced uncertainly around, gauging the roads. The road leading east was a minor one, barely more than a track, and it would peter out even further as it came up against the edge of the valley, the tall stark ridge of the mountains that loomed like a wall in the direction of sunrise.

But it was to the east that his heart tugged him, the faint pull like a ribbon attached to his breastbone and leading off into the distance. He turned onto the eastwards track, and Kurogane followed. He remembered the maps; beyond the jagged barrier of the mountains was scrubland, unclaimed and unfarmed and lawless, and then, further eastwards still, was what he sought. He knew it in his bones.

"Clow," Syaoran said. "The desert kingdom. The place where I was born, where I lived before Father found me."

"Why Clow?" Kurogane asked in irritation. "Of all the places in the world, why there?"

Syaoran was silent for a while, struggling to articulate his certainty. Images filled his mind, bright, hot, sandy images of the homeland he barely remembered. The blazing sun and the hard, dusty ground; dry breezes moving through alleys of cracked clay walls; and above all, the brilliant blue of the sky, like nothing he'd ever seen since he came to these wet, cloudy westlands.

"I just do," he said at last.

Kurogane snorted; Syaoran supposed he deserved that scorn. But at least he settled back in his own saddle. "Well, I guess we'll see how good these things really are at climbing rocks," he grumbled.

"Yes," Syaoran said gratefully. "Without them we'd have to go all the way down the valley and then circle around the mountains to the south. This way will save us weeks of travel."

And that was a good thing, because Sakura... Syaoran tried to shove away thoughts of Sakura being hurt, being scared, waiting desperately for someone to ride to her rescue. It was impossible; he might as well try to block out breathing. His princess was somewhere out there, in the great and terrible deserts of Clow - somewhere, she was suffering, and she needed him to save her.

---

Sakura emerged blinking into the bright light of the afternoon sun, sloping in from the west in a brilliant azure sky. The hushed, dark stone chapel had been cold, but out in the sunlight it was quite pleasant, with warm breezes periodically tugging at her clothes and hair.

Fronting the courtyard was a lush garden, with carefully tended trees and banks of flowers interspersed by gravel paths. A broad green lawn of grass stretched away into the distance; Sakura's eye followed it until it seemed to drop off abruptly into the blue sky.

"Walk with me for a space, Princess," Fei Wong Reed said. "I am sure that you are confused. I will tell you who we are, and why I have brought you here."

She did. Sakura tagged along behind Fei Wong Reed, walking sedately along the path ahead of her. She had to take two quick steps for every careful, measured one of his; he moved with a certain ponderous inevitability, like a mountain going for a stroll. But if he had any destination in mind, he did not seem to be in a hurry to get there, nor to speak again.

This strange man, who seemed so melancholy and yet so dangerous at the same time - frightened and fascinated her. She was scared and confused by being pulled away so abruptly from her family and home, and yet Fei Wong Reed had been kind to her, and shown her this lovely garden. He'd said he needed her, that he'd been waiting for her. In all her fourteen years of life, no one had ever needed her before. And to save the world? What had he meant by that? He couldn't possibly mean it for real, could he?

At last she gulped a little, sneaking glances up and around her; she saw nothing around her that looked even remotely familiar. "Um, um," she said, "where are we?"

"I apologize for your abrupt translocation," Fei Wong Reed said after a pause. "You will find this place quite pleasant, I hope; every one of your needs will be tended to during your stay. If you tire, or desire food or drink, simply ask anyone here, and they will assist you. All of the servants here are members of our chapter, and none would so much as dream as offer you any discourtesy."

A little ways away from them Sakura saw the distant figures of gardeners bending over the flower beds, dressed in simple black clothes like her host. She waved tentatively to two of them as they walked past, and the man glanced up at her, then bowed in a gesture of deep respect as the woman sank into a deep curtsey. She faltered a little way behind her host, then had to patter quickly ahead to keep up. "Yes, but where are we?" she persisted.

"Eden," he said. A broad arm swept out to gesture to the beautiful garden, and she nervously ducked her head away from the trailing sleeve. "A paradise that we have cultivated for many years. Someday soon, all the world shall be just such a garden, when the White God comes to us. Until then, we make do with this humble plot of land."

"Oh," Sakura said. He still hadn't answered her question, but she was too intimidated to pester him further about it. "Um, can I, can I go home soon? Everyone at the palace is going to be so terribly worried when they find I'm gone..." Although Sakura couldn't help but think to herself, after all her father's and Ferio's and Fai-niisan's protectiveness and paranoia - in the end she hadn't even needed to disobey and run off to be kidnapped. Life wasn't fair.

"I apologize for the distress your family may be feeling," Fei Wong Reed said in a deep, measured voice. "But the need that compelled me to bring you here is very great. I could not allow their stifling over-protectiveness to hold you back. In time, if you should wish it, I will certainly return you to the home that confined you. But first, I beg that you will hear my proposal."

A blush touched Sakura's face, and she ducked her head and twisted her fingers together. She'd never been in the position of an adult begging her for her help - for anything. At the very least, she should hear him out, she thought. "Okay," she said. "I mean, okay, I'm listening. Um, if you don't mind my asking, who are you? I've never really heard of the White God... or of the 'Heralds' before. And I've never seen your symbol." She reached out tentatively to indicate the worked gold medallion around his neck, then snatched her hand back shyly.

"You would not have," Fei Wong Reed said, and to her surprise, he had a slight smile on his face. "Our fraternity does not advertise. It would invite too much unwelcome attention from temporal governments interested only in power for themselves. But although our numbers are not large, we have always been here, working quietly in the background, for centuries, to bring about the coming of the White God."

"So this - this service of the God? So it's like a religion?" she asked. All Sakura knew of religion, which wasn't much, she'd learned in books; it was never a topic of great interest in Ceres. But she knew religion was very important in other countries; in Nihon, the Emperor was considered the descendant of the divine sun goddess Amaterasu, and ruled with the support of the priest caste. But what Fei Wong Reed was describing didn't sound anything like her textbook's descriptions of Amaterasu.

"I would not call it a religion," Fei Wong Reed said slowly. "When men speak of religion, they mean a set of fictions that they agree to believe. When men speak of faith, they mean to do nothing while hoping for a better world to come of its own accord. Do not mistake the White God for the flimsy pretensions of other cults and religions. She is real. She is a being of transcendent power and limitless benevolence, not like anything of this world. She lives in another realm, another plane of existence, but she is quite real."

"I don't understand," Sakura confessed.

"You have grown up with wizards and magicians," Fei Wong Reed began, "so already I know that your understanding of the world is much greater than most foolish children your age. But even the wizards of Ceres are limited in their understanding of the world, like children who play in a sandbox and never look to see the world outside the boundaries of the box. Those who have the knowledge and the power to look beyond the boundaries of this fragile world know that there is more to the cosmos than our pitiful humanity. There are realms out there that our human minds can barely comprehend, and races of beings who live in those realms who are far beyond mortal humans. It is from those transcendent realms that the White God comes."

He reached up to pull the medallion over his head, and held it out to her, glinting brilliantly in the sun. "This mark is the symbol of those who seek to serve Her. The wings represent Her divine status, and the gold represents Her limitless light. Make no mistake, the God is not human; she is something far greater, a being so beyond us that we are to her as no more than gnats. She has a soul, like human beings, but unlike humans, she is free of corruption. Her soul contains only light, never any darkness. That is why we need Her, to bring her pure goodness into the world."

"But think a lot of religions want to make the world better," Sakura said. "They - the big ones, anyway - all have moral codes, which encourage people to be kind and peaceful to each other and, and avoid sin. Why do you say that yours isn't like that?"

The path they followed had wound around a clump of flowering trees, and opened into a little paved court surrounding a fountain. "Many religions profess to have superior morality, and all pretend themselves the truth. But the real truth is that these religions are flawed because they are created and administered by men. Men are flawed and corrupt by nature, and given enough time and opportunity, they will bend all things to serve their appetites. No matter how sound their principles, or how idealistic the structure of the churches they build for themselves, all religions will inevitably succumb to the temptations of man. And so they use their own high ideals for money, wealth and power, and in doing so become no better than the sinners they excoriate."

"Oh," Sakura said again, not sure how to respond to this formidable man. In some ways he reminded her of her father; King Ashura had a similar air of imposing authority, although his was tempered with a hard-edged dynamism. But there was none of her father's usual cool disapproval, cold disappointment when he looked at her. He didn't seem to mind her presence, had even invited her to walk with him, and was willing to answer her questions.

He gestured at a stone bench sitting before the fountain; shyly, she sat before it. He seemed to be waiting for her response. Taking a deep breath, she dared another question. "My tutor once said," she began, thinking of Yukito, of Fai, of the other learned men who'd seen to her education. "That it's not that men are evil, but when they're forced into terrible situations, then they will do desperate things to protect themselves and their loved ones. He says that because people don't have enough of things that they need, like - like food and shelter and things, then they will fight each other for them. He said that there will always be disasters like famines and earthquakes, because the world isn't perfect, and so there will always be suffering."

"That is very like a Ceresian to say," Fei Wong Reed said in a dry voice. "But your tutor was a fool; or perhaps he wished to give you a kinder view of the world. The truth is that men need no excuses or shortages to behave cruelly to each other; they need no more reason than their own petty greed, or intolerance, or ignorance."

"But ignorance can be cured by education, can't it?" Sakura said anxiously. "And intolerance, too. People can learn to be peaceful with each other, as long as they understand each other, like Ceres and Nihon did to end the war. They just need to be taught!"

Fei Wong Reed sighed, a minute exhalation of breath that shifted his large body imperceptibly. "You are very kind yourself, Princess," he said, "and you wish to believe that all people are like you. But they are not. There are many educated nobles who are no more tolerant or understanding of others than the most ignorant peasant; indeed, they use their own high learning to justify their superiority, making elaborate excuses for their petty thievery against their fellow man."

"You keep saying that humans are bad, and that we need the God to save us," she said. "But, but, that isn't true, is it? I mean, some people are bad, but most people are good at heart. I think that all most people want to do is live their lives and be happy with their families. Isn't it awfully dangerous, bringing someone from another dimension into this world?"

Fei Wong Reed stopped walking and turned to face her, a deepening scowl on her face. Sakura quailed, regretting her question. "Princess," Fei Wong Reed said, his voice growing deeper and rougher with some tightly controlled emotion. "You are young still; you have lived most of your life as a child, sheltered and pampered by rich and powerful men who protected you from the ills of the world. I have lived for many centuries, and I have seen many empires rise and fall, and the one thing that never changes from one nation to the next is the cruelty of man. There are some good men, it is true, but no matter how they struggle against the tide of cruelty and apathy, they can leave no more than a passing footprint on the sand, to be washed away by the next wave..."

"That's not true," Sakura interrupted. "My father - my father is a good man, and he's worked hard to make Ceres a better place. He's made a difference. I know he has!"

"Do you think the sycophants and hangers-on in your court tell you the truth to your face, Princess?" Fei Wong Reed inquired with withering sarcasm. "Your father, yes, I know of him. He is full of ambitions; perhaps he means well. But even in your very own country, so enlightened and civilized, the slaughter continues. Were you aware that the people of Ceres, as in Valeria, believe that sin is inherited? That the evils committed by a parent are passed on to the children? In most rural mountain villages, if a man is executed for a crime, then their children will also be killed, even down to the smallest infant. Did you never know?"

Sakura's breath caught, and tears sprang painfully to her eyes. "No..." she whispered. "That can't be true, can it...?"

"Open your eyes to the truth, Princess," Fei Wong Reed told her remorselessly. "Every country has their own atrocities, not only Ceres. Everyone! Nihon prides itself on being a great empire, the most sophisticated in the world, and yet the majority of the people in Nihon are treated like animals, bound into serfdom under the harsh tyranny of their samurai masters. A member of the samurai can steal, or rape, or kill a serf with no consequences; and yet a peasant who commits even the smallest crime may be repaid with brutal torture or death."

"No, they wouldn't," Sakura protested; images of Kurogane-san flashed before her eyes, so big and strong and yet so restrained and kind. He would never, ever abuse his power that way, would he...?

"They would, and they do. I have seen it with my own eyes, countless times across the Empire. In the conquered provinces of the Nihon empire, the Nipponese do not even try to disguise their arrogant brutality. In Koryo, the conquered people cannot own lands, or even use their family names; instead they are assigned degrading nicknames by the Nihon provincial government, and denied even the smallest rights and protections. Wives and daughters are dragged from their homes and pressed into camp followers for the Nihon army, 'comfort women' to serve their pleasure as they seek out yet more countries to conquer -"

"Please stop," Sakura said, tears escaping her eyes as she brought her hand up to cover her mouth. "I don't believe it, it can't be true,"

"But the Nipponese, imperialistic as they are, do not have the monopoly on senseless cruelty," Fei Wong Reed continued remorselessly, stepping closer to the girl to loom over her. "In Hanshin, where rebellions still crop up every few years against Nihon rule, the rebels set fires every year which spread wildly out of control. They do not care how many innocents die in their vendetta against Nihon; indeed, they despise their own countrymen as 'collaborators' and take great pleasure in their deaths.

"In Autozam, where Nihon has campaigned for years to gain a foothold but not yet succeeded, they declare themselves free. A vile hypocrisy, when their economy is supported by slave labor; men and women and children of other races being captured from other countries and put to work in their mines. In Clow, the desert country, where water is more precious than gold, a few rich men control all the wealth of the country; they lavishly waste water on their estates, in elaborate fountains that spill carelessly into the sand, while outside their gates beggars die of thirst in the unrelenting desert heat.

"In Jade country, far to the east, the people think themselves very pious and holy; they pray incessantly to their fiction of a God and denounce all other religions as heresy. Any individual who is suspected of heresy - or even just someone conveniently unable to defend themselves against the charge - is denounced as a witch, and burned alive and public executions -"

"Stop!" Sakura cried, covering her ears with both hands and squeezing her eyes shut. "I don't want to hear it, I don't want to know any more! It can't all be true, it can't be, it can't be!"

She drew her legs up on the stone bench beside her, curling around herself to try to combat the piercing pain in her middle. Fei Wong Reed's merciless words drilled into her, and she couldn't stop hearing them, imagining the poor people being hurt and killed everywhere, while no one could stop it and no one could help -

A strong, cool hand gripped her wrist, and unpeeled her from her shaking huddle. She blinked up through tear-stained eyes at Fei Wong Reed; his face was stern, although his eyes were oddly compassionate.

"I have no reason to lie to you, Princess," Fei Wong Reed said. His voice was a soft rumble, but inexorable. "I will show you, in the portals through which I have watched the world, the truth of everything I have told you. Closing your eyes to the ills of the world does not make them go away. Only action can do that; and you,Sakura, have the capability to take that action. The world cries out for salvation, Princess. Do not turn your back on it."

Sakura rubbed her face against her sleeve to dry the tears, sniffing as she wiped snot away on the cuff of her sleeve. "I don't understand what you want me to do," she said in a trembling voice. "Why do you need me?"

"Because you alone have the power to call out the god," Fei Wong Reed answered.

"But, but," she said. "There are lots of other wizards who can talk to all sorts of things. Fai-niisan is really good at it, he can talk to animals and rainclouds and dead spirits, as well. But I can't do anything like that."

Fei Wong Reed made a curt, dismissive gesture. "Any two-bit necromancer or charlatan can speak with the lesser creatures of the mundane world, or command the degraded spirits of the dead," he said scornfully. "Your voice has the power to breach worlds, and when you call out with your power, nothing can resist you. You must reach across the gap between worlds to find the white god, speak with her, and make known our need. In her benevolence she will feel pity for our suffering, and if you summon her, she will come."

Sakura looked down, at her scuffed sandals framed by the dark stone of the bench. "I'm not special," she said. "I've never been special. I've never been able to help anyone."

"You are not merely 'special,'" Fei Wong Reed told her, with unshakeable conviction. "You are unique. And as such, most limited fools will not be able to see or understand your invaluable talent. No one has ever called for your aid before because they did not fully understand your potential. But I do, and I have brought you here beyond the grasping and limiting reaches of your misguided guardians, so that you may train your talent and learn to put it to use."

He paused for a moment, then reached down to put his hand under her face and tilt her chin upwards. "You, and you alone, have the power to save the world. Will you?"

Sakura blinked the last tears out of her eyes, and tried to look somewhere, anywhere else besides his iron face, his penetrating, demanding eyes. She wasn't sure that she believed him yet, about her special power - but she wanted to, oh, she wanted to believe him. Her slim body thrummed with conflicting emotions, excitement and fear, nearly trembling at the thought that she might really be able to save everyone.

She'd only known Fei Wong Reed for a few hours, yet she thought he was telling the truth. She'd always - ever since she was a child - been able to tell when someone was lying, and she knew that Fei Wong Reed was not. He really did mean to help the world, and he believed that he could do it with her help. She sensed an intensity in him, a passion to accomplish great deeds that went far beyond even her father's.

She'd never been any use to her father; his announcement in the council chamber opened her eyes to the fact that regarded her as a mere pawn to be used and cast aside. Fai-niisan was powerful and kind, but he would never have asked for her help; he still regarded her as a child. To everyone else in Ceres, she was a burden, a shameful secret that had to be constantly watched and protected. Another face popped into her mind - Syaoran, the boy from Nihon, the traveler who'd been to many countries and had befriended her. Syaoran...

Syaoran had told her not to be afraid, to look at new places as a challenge and an adventure instead of a trial to be feared. Syaoran had promised her that someday, the chance would come for her to be able to change the world, and when it came, she had to be ready to take it.

She opened her eyes, and looked up to meet Fei Wong Reed's gaze squarely. "Yes," she told him. "I will."

---

~to be continued...

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